Four Days Drive

always beyond my hopes

2010-07-07T15:21:00.000-07:00

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen." Eph. 3:20-21

This has been a personal favorite for a long time because of the constant reality it has been in all my life experiences. As many of you know, when Derek and I first moved to Oregon we, like most others, did not have jobs. It was a difficult reality for me to face that I'd be venturing into the sub world after having what I considered to be the all time best teaching experience. I wrestled through it for 2 years having the verse above help carry me through (and of course the Spirit!). Like most times in life, I knew, but did not quite fathom how true this scripture is of God. I am so very grateful for the transformation God performed in my life, and Derek's, as I subbed. That is what has been best for me spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically...in all the ways only God really knows.

Never had I imagined that I'd be in the position in which I find myself now. I have been provided a teaching position for the upcoming school year. I will be job sharing with a very admirable and experienced teacher part-time. And, like always, the situation I find myself entering into is far beyond anything I had imagined. I'm so glad that God "determines our steps" as the Proverb states. And, it gives me further joy to know that this is not the last time that I will be in awe of God's work and character! Please rejoice with me in this truth and give Him glory for His goodness.

Staci Nickleson

Pictures tell all...

2010-04-20T21:28:00.000-07:00

I haven't written in forever. So again, the pictures will have to tell all. Long story short, visited family in Indiana, Elias shot his first rifle, Jael played dress-up, the kids played with puppies and pigs, went back to Eugene, the kids posed for pics on top of Skinner's Butte, Elias broke his leg playing football, he's on his 3rd cast, we had Easter at Lawrence Street Chapel, and that's about it.

Hope all of you who are reading this are well.

Clint

Slow down and rest

2010-03-08T08:43:00.000-08:00

Side note: I'm pretty sure, ever since I was born I was a child that was always busy. I rarely sit still. It's almost impossible for me.

But lately I've been just "sitting" (haha!) on the thought of being still and resting. I wonder how possible it really is to just be still and know that God is God? We all have our endless obligations to attend to and our calendars are already filled up to the max. But I still yearn to be still. Are we created for that? I sure think so. Why else would God have declared the sabbath a day to rest? Ok, so my mind can wrap around all of the logic behind rest. I get it. But why don't I do that more regularly?

I am laughing currently as I am sitting here on my couch, icing my twisted ankle, and realized what a perfect time to just rest. Hmmmmmm...yet here is what is really on my mind. Ugh, I have laundry to do but I'm pretty sure it would take me 20 minutes to get up and down the basement steps. I need to run errands so that I can be ready for the week. I could wash the dishes that are sitting in the sink, but my ankle would probably hate me. I need to go to the library, but again stupid ankle. Excuses, excuses, and more excuses. I just keep thinking about all of the things I "need" to be doing. But what about just taking today to rest in Jesus?

I'm not wired to slow down and rest. I'm wired to go, go, and go some more! But then there are those times when something happens (twisting an ankle) that forces you to slow down and rest. I'm pretty sure God is a humorous God who is looking at me right now laughing, saying how good he got me now! Sometimes it just takes work to slow down, especially if you are like me.

Who knew that my twisted ankle would remind me to slow down? God knows what he's doing. :)

Much love,
Stacie

Family Pics and rambling thoughts

2010-02-01T14:56:00.000-08:00

Thought I would post some pics of the family since it's been forever since I've last been on here. I really have good intentions about blogging more often but then don't seem to follow through. My bad! Anyway, things are good from the McKinnis family of 4 in Eugene. We had a good Christmas even though it was kind of tough being away from parents and grandparents in Indiana. We cut down our own tree this year and I hung lights in our apartment. It looked like a college dorm room when I finished it, which really wasn't what I was going for! Elias is still enjoying school. He does such a great job of listening but he's kind of a "tattle tell." He always wants to point out to the teacher if someone is doing something wrong or not listening. We think he has a little crush on a girl in his class. He always looks forward to Fridays when she's in his class. I guess he's starting young...ha! Jael still has blond hair and blue eyes so I'm not sure how that worked out. She is absolutely beautiful and loves to play and joke around. She is at such a fun age right now and is just so full of life. We really couldn't be prouder parents of both our children.

Rachel is doing well. She continues to excel at being a mother, wife and basically the smartest person in our family! I continue to be amazed at how God has gifted her and how she always seems to have such profound wisdom to share. She really has a gift of wisdom and discernment. Our family is so blessed by her gifts, as well as our church.

Speaking of church, we are continuing to pursue the mission of demonstrating the kingdom of God here in Eugene. We are developing close friendships here and we continue to ask God to soften the hearts of our neighbors in this city. We are currently journeying through the Gospel of John right now as a community. Last night we discussed John 6 where Jesus says "do not work for food that spoils but for food that endures to eternal life." We talked about how food that spoils represents more than just physical food but anything other than Jesus that we are tempted to place our belief, trust, or hope in for nourishment, fulfillment, and life. It was good to hear our church body share how God has continued to teach them this lesson and how we are all constantly being called by God to deeper waters of faith and trust in him.

I want to leave you with a Psalm that has given me hope for a city that by in large loves creation but not the Creator.

Psalm 19:1-6 (The Message)
God's glory is on tour in the skies, God-craft on exhibit across the horizon. Madame Day holds classes every morning, Professor Night lectures each evening.

Theirs words aren't heard, their voices aren't recorded, But their silence fills the earth: unspoken truth is spoken everywhere.

God makes a huge dome for the sun - a superdome! The morning sun's a new husband leaping from his honeymoon bed, The daybreaking sun an athlete racing to the tape.

That's how God's Word vaults across the skies from sunrise to sunset, Melting ice, scorching deserts, warming hearts to faith.

God, please warm hearts to faith in Eugene!

Clint

Absence

2010-01-10T14:32:00.000-08:00

So, I noticed that it has been quite a while since I have posted any thoughts on our blog. I don't know exactly why that is. During my absence from the blog, much has happened here in Eugene. Staci and I have moved to a new apartment, adopting Drew as our roommate (or maybe he adopted us), I have made a few job transitions, and new friendships have been established. We just got back not too long ago from spending some time with family in Indiana, and now are back into our daily routines. Amidst all of this, I think often about our Church here, okay, I think about it most all the time, and I am in awe of the fact that God has trusted us to be in this place during this season. My thoughts continually go the first century Churches that Paul, Peter, John, and others wrote about in the New Testament. You see, these Churches were planted in places that had little background on who God was (or is), who the person of Jesus was, and had many competing spiritual paths. I think a lot about Paul and how he spent much time getting to know the culture of many of these places, and through that, connected with them. He was fully present in those locations. In fact, he spent years in Ephesus making tents and meeting with people. He was not absent, not some preacher who locked himself in an office inside a church building writing sermons. He molded his messages to the culture of the community and presented the Gospel in all its truth. Jesus did the same thing. He met people where they were at, loved them, healed them, and taught them the truths of God. He was fully present. And now, by His grace, we are inhabited by the Holy Spirit who is fully present with us as we journey through this earthly life. When I think about these things, I realize that absence was not an option for God. He desired to be present in the lives of His people. He is continually present in His Creation now, and He desires for people to know this. As Paul understood, to communicate this to communities of people who had little background or misconceptions of God, you must be present with them, build relationships, and love them. I love Eugene. I love the people here and have thoroughly enjoyed my time in Eugene so far. As Staci and I were walking this morning, I realized that we live in a beautiful place, and that God desires us to be fully present here. He is never absent from our lives and I desire to live in a way that avoids being absent from the people of Eugene.

Strings of memories

2009-12-15T13:55:00.000-08:00

I don't know where to start with this. To be honest, I've tried to write this little journal entry 2 previous times (both of them I deleted). So I sit here procrastinating other things to attempt try #3.

In my staff lounge there are some things hanging on the wall. There's 2 long thin pieces of string with small, cute paper clips attached. Attached to those paper clips are little squares of fabric. On the little pieces of fabric are memories written down for two incredible special ladies. Both are co-workers. One string belongs to a lady who was diagnosed with a brain tumor last spring and is currently not doing well. The other string belongs to a lady who has stage 4 lung cancer and has never smoked in her life. Oh they are beautiful strings of memories.

I wrote one today and clipped it on the string. I have one more to write and have until tomorrow to write it and am still unable to think of what to put on that little piece of fabric. Oh string of memories you are seriously breaking my heart.

I love this little project and it brings me so much joy. It's a gift that I know these ladies will truly love and cherish. Yet all I can do is cry thinking about it because I can see the faces of the ladies reading, or have them read to them, the little pieces of fabric. And as I envision them reading them I see tears run down their faces. I know they will be tears of joy.

So as I process this holiday season I am starting to think more and more about what I would write on a little piece of fabric for the people in my life that I care about. I challenge you to think more about how much people mean to you during this season and maybe even pass them a note telling them so.

Much love,
Stacie :)

He uses the weak

2009-12-14T10:02:00.000-08:00

These last several months we’ve been in the book of John. Just a couple of weeks ago we came to the story of Jesus and the Samaritan woman. There is such beauty in this interaction. As I read and prayed over the passage I realized that this encounter is completely loaded with truth, challenge, and love. One thing that really struck me that I’d never really noticed before is the utter beauty in the Samaritan woman being the one to share the truth of the Messiah with her town.

The Samaritans already were looked down upon because of their history and the fact that they were “half breeds.” I know this sounds harsh, but it’s just the way it was then. Back in the day these were some of the people corrupting the Jews because they did not worship God. However, some began to learn. So, already she was of low status because of these things; then, on top of it all, she herself was an outcast within her own culture because of the lifestyle that had caused her to have many husbands, etc. Sadly, she was the low of the low. She didn’t even go to collect water at the well during the cool hours of the morning and likely because she made every effort to avoid the company of the other woman that surely had a poor opinion of her.

But, the beauty of it is Jesus goes out of his way to show up at this well when she is there. He speaks to her and surfaces her life of many husbands. He shares with her that He has a fulfilling and abundant life to offer her and tells that He is the Messiah she’s heard about. When she hears this she runs directly to an audience who doesn’t think the best of her, she openly exposes herself to them again but this time with hope, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?” And, they immediately leave the town and follow her to Jesus.

“Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth.

But, God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.

He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are…” 1 Cor. 1:26-29

God can use, will use, and does use the most unlikely (in our minds, or society) people to reveal Himself and His glory. I want to invite this into my life. I want to leave that opportunity open to all, not just the people who make me feel comfortable or good about my own status.

And, shouldn’t I, then, desire to be weak and low and despised in this world?

Staci N.

life.is.messy.

2009-11-13T22:02:00.000-08:00

life is messy, right? well, it might not be messy to some people and i really can't speak for everyone. i'll just speak for me. my life, in it's current state, is messy. i live by my regular day to day activities, while juggling the other stuff that suddenly just pops up out of nowhere, which is usually the messy stuff. by messy i mean, being hurt, stresses, unrealistic expectations, or anything that you can think of and remember that is usually, but not always, negative.

in these moments i really try to dig deep into God. i have prayed, read, and listened to music that help soothe my soul, yet i still feel empty, but i don't feel alone. i even tried to repeat over and over again that i am ok. i was not ok and it's ok that i wasn't ok. life.is.messy. david understood that in the psalms. he got it and helps me to be ok with not always being ok.

part of me fights to keep everything together at all times. seriously, ugh, i hate that about me. who really wants to admit that you aren't ok? what good does it do to hold it all inside? i know i'm not freed from a lot of my junk when i keep it all inside that's for sure.

thank you God for your patience in your body. we don't get it half the time, well maybe like most of the time. there is nothing more than a body of believers getting together, sharing in their own messiness, and being freed. it makes me want to share, to be real, to be vulnerable, and to not be fearful that i am living life along. i want to meet people where they are in their own brokenness. we are all jaded, hurt, and live in some pretty messy lives. my life might not seem that messy to you or your life might not seem that messy to me, but somehow, someway, we are learning how to meet each other right where we are. God is definitely up to something bigger with us. He's even up to something bigger with His church.

John 10:10 is what i hear when i can't hear anything else.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

much love,
stacie :)

What a weekend!

2009-11-09T08:58:00.000-08:00

This past weekend we had a group of 9 people come from Indiana and California. Paul, Marsha, and Caleb Schlegel, Brett and Claire Black, Adam and Rene Everhart, and Greg and Kim Snodgrass (I hope I spelled everyone's name right...). Anyway, they came late on Friday night and took a red-eye home on Sunday night. They came to spend some time with our church plant and help out with a community event our church hosted this past Sunday for the poor and hungry of Eugene.. The event was in partnership with a Christian ministry in Eugene called Free People (www.freepeopleeugene.com). Their mission is to serve the poor of Eugene/Springfield and they have been a tremendous blessing to Awakening Church. Anyway, we rented out a performance hall in Eugene and threw a party with free food, clothes, and live music. It was a great day and we served nearly 450 plates of food. We are so thankful for our friends from Indiana and California who sacrificed work days, money, and time away from family and friends to come and spend a couple of days with us. Their time and presence encouraged us so much. Our church loves it when people come and visit us. We love to host people and show off our city. So if you're thinking about coming out, we'd love to have you.

Anyway, thank you so much to our friends from Indiana and California who encouraged us so greatly this past weekend.

Just for the fun of it, I put up some recent photos of the family, Halloween, pumpkin patch, and this past weekend. Enjoy!

Clint

Grace

2009-10-28T15:03:00.000-07:00

I am called to worship and live my life for Jesus. It's not just a calling, it's what gives me the most joy. Yet I fail so much at it. I'm not sure I will ever understand the full extent of grace, but one thing that sticks out to me the most is a psalm that talks about how we may stumble, but God will never let us trip. Thank goodness! I don't know about you, but there are so many times where I just feel like I am walking around, barely able to stand up anymore. We can easily stumble over anything, but God will not let me trip and fall down so hard that I just can't get up again. He's not going to beat me up, but I sure do.

Grace.

He does love me so much that he continues to grab me in His hands and balances me. I would say that I sometimes forget how much God loves me, but in actuality I think I forget that more than sometimes. I need help remembering that I am loved. It makes me extremely grateful, more than ever, to be journeying with people that share with me that I am loved and give me more grace than I deserve.

Grace and Love,
Stacie

2009-10-28T11:35:00.000-07:00

This past year (plus a few months) has been a time that I cannot seem identify the stages, or the words with which to describe the stages, God has taken both my husband and I through (hence, the very few blogs!). 14 months ago Derek and I moved to Eugene with the purpose in mind of sharing abundant life, love and rescue offered through Jesus. Never had I imagined what God had in store for our own lives in order to experience that ourselves. And, it's funny now looking back and recalling Derek's boldness and prayer for God to bring suffering into our lives that we may grow and really experience Him...boy, oh boy!

The best I can think to describe this past year for us is a constant state of confusion. Confusion at what our lives are going to look like and how to pursue that next step when we don't even really know what we were stepping toward. I am coming to realize that perhaps the confusion comes from the fact that our hearts and perceptions have been taken to the furnace and are being reoriented from our old ways when the next step was clear to us: advance and climb the ladder this world has created. God has really been patient with us as we continue to learn what He values versus what this world values; and, unfortunately, what I had unknowingly begun to value over Him. While I continue to seek God's guidance and struggle to let go, I am thankful and hopeful that our pursuit is shifting from this "earn more" mentality to "seek ye first the kingdom..." While God could very rightfully keep us in a state of constant confusion as we grasp for some sort of handle of what's next, He is merciful and gives us these undeserved moments of grace and gifts of hope. God is God. He is not required to show any sort of tangible evidence that He is faithful and in control. And, I really ought to be able to just believe. Yet, He allows me a moment, an experience that I can grab onto and rejoice in. He is worthy.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." Eph. 3:20-21

Staci

Chowder with Crowder

2009-10-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

What a story I have to share with you! As many of you know, Elias has been a gigantic David Crowder fan since he was born (seriously). Anytime we would play David Crowder he would just chill out and just focus on the music. As he grew older he began to sing David Crowder songs and watch concerts of the David Crowder Band. His grandpa got him a guitar and he would play along and mimic everything David Crowder did on the DVD. In the last 6-9 months he began to get really into drums. He began talking about Bwack, the drummer for the David Crowder Band. He would set up boxes, clothes baskets, and pretty much anything else that made sounds and would bang those things like crazy. In all reality, Elias amazes me with his rhythmical ability at such a young age.

Anyway, a couple of months ago we heard that the David Crowder Band was coming to Eugene for their new Church Music concert. We freaked out needless to say. We told Elias about it and he freaked out! Well, in true Rachel and Clint form we procrastinated about buying our tickets until 2 days before the concert. Truly, we were hesitant in buying 3 tickets because it was pretty expensive for us. Two days before the concert, Rachel was listening to the Christian radio station and they had a contest to win 2 Tickets to the David Crowder Band Concert. On top of that, the winner would get to meet the band before the concert over some Clam Chowder Soup (hence "Chowder with Crowder"). Anyway, Rachel called in and submitted her name in the morning. I didn't think twice about it, but later that evening Rachel got a call from the radio station and she had won. ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!! We flipped out! (I would like to think that God was rewarding us for our procrastination but I don't think that's it...ha!) So we headed to the concert 2 days later and took Elias with us. We got to meet and hang out with the David Crowder Band and Elias got to talk with David Crowder and Bwack. Elias was kind of shy. I don't think he knew what the do since he watches them on TV all the time. Anyway, the band was so cool and friendly and we thanked them so much for their time. We took some pictures and then went to the concert. Elias had a blast and played the air drums all night long. It ended up being way past his bed time and he actually feel asleep for the last two songs.

It was an incredible night and Rachel and I were so grateful that God had given us this beautiful gift. Elias will never forget that experience. It kind of reminded us of Matthew 7:7-12. Rachel and I, not being nearly perfect, were able to give our son a good gift. How much more does our perfect father in heaven want to give good gifts to us. What an incredible God we serve!

Clint

P.S. Elias didn't want to stop and take pictures during the concert...thus the not so happy facial expressions...ha!

Few Words...Many Pics

2009-10-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

So, I noticed that I haven't written since July 6th. Wow!!! My bad! There has been way too much happen since then for me to try to write it all. So I'll summarize the big things and then put some pics up for you all to check out. I do sincerely apologize for not writing in the last 2-3 months. I've just lost track of it and need to get on it again. Thank you to all who check this site and pray for us often.

A quick summary...

Jael moved from her crib to a big girl (twin size) bed. Rachel and kids frequented the local farms this summer to pick all kinds of berries...yum! We took the kids camping this summer, which they love doing. My sister and nephew visited from Indianapolis. Elias turned 4 and we had a great birthday party. We bought him a drum set for his birthday (pic to come soon) and we're wondering if that was a good or bad idea...ha! Our friend Jill Reid visited from Indiana and we were blessed to have her. My parents (and older sister) visited and were here for almost 2 weeks. Elias started pre-school 3 days/week and absolutely loves it. We went to the Ocean and the Portland Zoo. The kids played almost every day with their neighbor friends. We have 8 kids between the ages of 7 weeks - 4 years in our little corner of the apartment complex.

We had a great first summer in Eugene!!!

Blessings,

Cint

Roller coaster

2009-09-18T17:31:00.000-07:00

I find it completely interesting how in a 24 hour time span I can go from completely relaxed and content to completely overwhelmed and stressed out. I do feel like my life is just on one crazy roller coaster and like it or not I'm on it for the ride.

Today I spent the bike ride commute home just desperately trying to find some calmness and peace in my endless thinking brain. I passed some turtles, ducks, too many bees to count, grasshoppers, and a whole lot of quietness. It was good. I realized that even though my brain wants to go really fast on that roller coaster my eyes can experience the life around me.

So I'm learning how to balance the times in my life where I want to find some peace and calm when my brain does not want to stop. I want to look more and see life, not have it just pass me by. God has created so many beautiful things that I want to see, not miss.

Enjoy life today, friends. Peace to you.

Much love,
Stacie :)

Dirt

2009-08-28T22:45:00.000-07:00

Nothing makes me feel grosser than cleaning apartments before you have to move out. A year's worth of filth stares at you...taunting. I hate cleaning. Absolutely hate it. Not only am I surrounded by grossness, but it brings out the grossness in me. I turn into either this crazy barking obsessive jerk that likes to yell:) or I just fume, angry at myself and everyone around me for not cleaning earlier. And I hate being angry:) It definitely reminds me of my faults...which in the long run is good, but in the moment I completely hate it.

But...let me tell you what I love. I just got back from the redwoods...after talking about it for a year I finally went. And those trees are everything I had hoped they would be. Now I love trees:) It's in my blood I think. And looking at things so bigger than you really remind you how small you are. But it's so pretty, you don't feel insignificant: just small. I hope I can see God in the rest of my life as much as I see Him in those trees.
Sarah

Our God is a Big God

2009-08-03T15:36:00.000-07:00

"Our God is a Big God."

I had a great conversation with a friend yesterday and she was the one that made that comment. It struck me pretty hard yesterday and I've been reflecting on that ever since. I mean really, what a cool statement, right?! It's true, our God is a BIG God. He has our backs, wants to free us, wants to love us, and will always be there. Yet most of the time I forgot that He ultimately can and will do anything for us if we turn to Him. That gives me so much hope.

Lately, I've been in a place of making a lot of distractions for myself. It's that place where you try to fill in whatever you are feeling with so many other things rather then dealing with it. I bet you know what I mean. I wanted to be my own god in a way. Ah, that's a little scary. But I think that place which I was in doesn't actually allow God to move in amazing ways. I made Him into a really small God. It was a little backwards.

I don't want to live in a place where I do not allow God to be big if that makes sense. What would happen if people that believed in God started to really trust God and believed that He could do things for us, our community, and our world? He's a BIG God! Nothing is impossible for Him. Nothing! No matter what I'm going through, what my friends are going through, what the people on the streets are going through, God will be there.

Thank you, God, for being a big God!

Much love,
Stacie :)

Deep Wells and Homemade Desserts

2009-07-21T17:58:00.000-07:00

One terrific perk about our group here is that we usually have tremendous homemade desserts around. These can vary from cookies to apple pie and brownies to flaming oranges (yes, we actually ignite them). Because of the handiwork of our group bakers, me not included, we have had the pleasure of providing these goodies to the group we hang out with at Lamb's Cottage. There is something about a handcrafted cookie or brownie that spurs conversation. These conversations can range from exchanging pleasantries to introspective muses on spirituality or the state of homelessness in Eugene. Whatever the topic, homemade desserts help to put us in a place of commonality to begin these engagements.

"Jacob's well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well.... When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, 'Will you give me a drink?' The Samaritan woman said to Him, 'You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?' (For Jews did not associate with Samaritans). Jesus answered her, 'If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked Him and He would have given you living water.' 'Sir,' the woman said, 'you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water?'

At this point, Jesus has engaged this woman in conversation and goes on to reveal some painful truths, but in doing so shines the light on her need for Him, the Son of God. Jesus, in His humanness, was tired and thirsty and He happened to meet this lady, who was from a people who opposed Jews and vice versa. He began a conversation by asking for some water. Sure, I believe that Jesus knew exactly what He was doing and where the conversation would lead, but it is interesting to see the beginning of it.

The story resumes later with the woman leaving her water jar and going back to town to tell others about this encounter with a man who says He is the Messiah. She testified as to what He said and what He knew about her and how He offered living water. They urged Jesus to stick around for a couple more days.

"And because of His words many more became believers. They said to the woman, 'We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world.'"

You see, when Jesus sat next to the deep well to rest, He engaged into conversation with the Samaritan woman and met her where she was at. Through this conversation she believed in Him and many others believed because of the words Jesus had to share. As we continue to journey though our life in His Kingdom, we should be ready to engage people where they are at. Each and every person is different, but each desires to be known. That is what is so miraculous about Jesus; He shared His message with many people, but interacted with them differently. So, whether we are resting next to a deep well or sharing a homemade treat with our neighbor (including those who you would never see yourself associating with), we can listen, talk, and share life with people and give them the good news of the Living Water.

D

Sundays

2009-07-14T21:07:00.000-07:00

For a while now, we've been helping out at Lamb's Cottage on Sunday nights. It's a small building in a park near by where people can get a meal as well as "soul food" (as dave refers to it as). This week was kinda special for us. Our friends who usually run it were gone this week and trusted us to give the meal and the message. Here's a few pics.
Kitchen Time

Dinner

Tables

Lonely Cupcake

Heartbeat

2009-07-12T10:56:00.000-07:00

Have you ever listened to your heartbeat? Pretty crazy huh? I mean, this muscle keeps pace like the rhythm of a metronome for our entire lives. Sometimes it accelerates quickly like when we are going up a flight of stairs or see a large bee (not me). And, sometimes it seems to drag on slowly like after a nice three hour nap (Drew knows what I am talking about). But, in general, we go about our daily lives not ever noticing the 80 beats per minute it ticks along. My Mom was just out here for a few days and it was a lot of fun having her in Oregon. We drove around and saw the coast, the mountains, and even a couple waterfalls up close. Whenever we have visitors, I tend to reflect on life out here. I am not sure why that is; maybe I am able to slow down a little bit and begin to notice all of the things going on around me. My life has become increasing busy over the last six months, mainly because 40 hours a week of it is spent in a bank, but also because we have met some great friends out here and have spent a lot of time hanging with them. Amongst this business challenges have also arisen. There are times where I wonder how things are going to work out, how bills will be paid, and how our future is going to look. I worry myself about these questions and most of the time try to figure it out on my own accord. Recently, Staci and I have seen answers to these challenges come about in ways we couldn't have anticipated. Now that I reflect on this, I realize that God is behind all of it, He always has been and always will be. Unfortunately, I do not take the time to sit and enjoy this truth enough. I notice it, but then I continue on with my "busy" day. This is not completely unlike noticing my heartbeat. Our Father is always working for us, always loving us, always. He tells Moses that His name is "I Am." He is always present, even when we aren't paying attention. I desire to slow down so that I can see more clearly the work He is doing in my life. I want to be more in tune to His voice, which David says in the Psalms is like a gentle whisper. So, as I am quiet enough to hear the melodic bass in my chest, maybe I can hear the gentle words of my Creator whispering "I Am."

D

Impossible & Possible

2009-07-06T07:40:00.001-07:00

Last night at our Sunday gathering we discussed Mark 10:17-31. In the past when I've heard this passage preached it has generally revolved around the idea of money and how money can become a road block to the Kingdom of God, especially if we love it more than we do God. But last night we spent most of the night focussing in on two other truths from that passage, namely that with God all things are possible (v.27) and that Christ Himself (through his Church) makes up one hundred fold for everything that is lacking when we 'leave everything to follow' Jesus (vv.28-31). I think the first truth that Jesus declares in v.27 is the one that has encouraged me the most recently. Shortly after I got out to Eugene, I began to get an overwhelming sense of helplessness here. And truth be told, I am confronted by that feeling a lot. To this point, I've never questioned our calling to Eugene, but the work that God has called us to do here does feel impossible. I find myself asking the same question the disciples asked to one another in v.26, who then can be saved? What an interesting question that is, especially coming from the disciples. Remember in Mark 1:17-18, Jesus invited them to follow Him and He would make them fishers of men. And at once they left their nets and followed him. Here they are, they've left everything (more than any of our church plant team has left) to follow Jesus for the sake of the gospel and now they've come face to face with the impossibility of the task they've been called to. With man this is impossible... What a helpless feeling? I kind of imagine Jesus pausing for quite some time after saying that first part of v.27. The kind of pause that makes everyone listening uncomfortable, not sure if they should do or say anything or just wait out the akward silence. But maybe Jesus had to pause to let the reality of the human condition sink in, namely that it is impossible for man to enter the kingdom of God in and of himself. That it's impossible for us to change the hearts of any of our friends here in Eugene in and of ourselves. And just when we begin to recognize the gravity of our condition, Jesus breaks the long pause...all things are possible with God. Maybe it's not so bad to feel helpless after all. Maybe it's not so bad to feel like the mission we've been called to in Eugene is impossible. Maybe that's exactly where God wants us to be! God shows up when the situation is impossible, period. Maybe our lives are meant to be lived in the healthy tension between feeling helpless and hopeful, fearful and faithful, desperate and dependent, maybe that's exactly where God wants us to be. I guess my prayer now is that Jesus will help me to live in the tension between the impossible and possible. The impossible so that I'm always reminded that I can't change anyone...the possible so that I'm always reminded that God alone can...and does!

Clint

The 4th

2009-07-05T12:57:00.000-07:00

One of Drew's neighbors gave us a mini fireworks show outside Clint&Rachel's apt. We only feared for our lives once when one of them chased us. hahahaha

I'm finding that holidays tend to be bitter sweet since leaving Indiana. I miss what I would have been doing with friends back home but I'm also thankful to have great new friends here and be apart of what's happening in Eugene.
Happy 4th from Eugene!!!
-Cj

Jesus wept.

2009-06-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

Oh sunday afternoon, how my heart breaks with compassion when you arrive. and you haven't left yet...

i'm still moved by my friend battling cancer. he plays guitar and sings, while another lady, and sometimes me, join in singing as well. yesterday was our last time for a long, long time. he sang with so much passion praising Jesus. it was special, emotional, and beautiful. i don't want it to be our last time. please no.

"Jesus wept."

Remember that story when Jesus stopped as mary was crying about lazarus being dead? Jesus wept.

Jesus felt the pain and was moved so much that all he could do was cry.

That was me yesterday afternoon. i had nothing but extreme sadness for the situation, but stopped the tears at least about 5 times. and today the sadness and compassion for my friend is still deep in my heart.

i was thinking last night about how we are created in the image of God. That we are the hands and feet of Jesus. it became a little more real to me as i reflected on yesterday afternoon. we are created to feel compassion for our brothers and sisters. we walk this earth to meet, pass, greet, and learn from others. and part of that process is to just express our deepest emotions through tears.

Jesus is crying for my friend. he's already taking care of him. thank you, Jesus. honestly, thank you. it brings so much peace to me and a lot of us out here. Our friend is not alone in this battle.

Much love,
Stacie

Summer break!

2009-06-19T09:17:00.000-07:00

Hi friends! I'm a teacher so that means summer break! Woo hoo! I just love this refreshing time of the year. My summer break started off with a really fun girls weekend last weekend. The girls had a sleepover and then headed the wildlife safari in Winston, Oregon. The boys headed towards the mountains (I believe) and did a camping trip. I wanted to post some pictures that my friend Allison took and let you experience what all the ladies experienced. The safari was a lot of fun and we all really enjoyed it!

I heard before that if you are on a church plant and you are still getting along then you are doing pretty well. I'm sure that the person stated that comment a little bit better then what I just said. Anyway, it is so great that I still want to be a part of this church plant, that I don't want to leave Eugene, and that I am growing a lot from my relationships with the team. And I'm also grateful for the new friends I have made here in Eugene, whether that be my choir friends, co-workers at my school, or the guys and gals at Lamb's Cottage. That is a huge praise!

I also want to echo staci's post. Thank you to all the people that read this blog. It is an encouragement to hear that people actually do read this and want to know what's going on in our lives. If any of our fans of this blog ever have something you want to share with us please feel free to email us at EugeneTeam@gmail.com or leave a comment on our blog. It makes us feel cool! :)

Much love,
Stacie :)

Simple Thoughts and Thankfulness

2009-06-16T13:22:00.000-07:00

I was out this morning on our patio reading and journaling a bit. As I reflected on our visit back to Indiana I realized how spiritually and emotionally refreshed and encouraged I feel. Last Sunday evening (our current trial house church night) we were talking about different things and it was mentioned how encouraging it was to be around all sorts of people that are interested and invested in our mission here in Oregon. It is so encouraging to hear all of our friends and family in Indiana are praying for us daily; which amounts to a lot of prayers a lot of times the day. That is such a comfort.

Also, upon returning to Oregon I feel a bit more charged and motivated to live into the call that brought us here. There are many reasons for this. For one, I am reminded that I did not leave my family, friends, and familiarity in order to live close to the mountains. I moved away from those dear people for a purpose and to follow a call. And, I feel like getting lazy with that call in some ways lets those of you believing, missing, and praying for us down. I of course know that you are all very proud of us. I guess I am just realizing that without your prayers, and ours as well, I am vulnerable to complacency and discouragement.

So, I thank our family and our friends for continuing to believe in that for which God has brought us here. I have not lost faith, but sometimes I get lazy. Thank you for aiding in renewing that sense of the call and for investing your prayers to help open doors and keep us going. Thank you for loving us and for praying.

Love,
Staci (with an "i" ;))

This is a picture of one of the crazy squirrels I told many of you about at the top of Black Butte. This is not the one, however, that belly flopped on my leg! (He was too good for our carrots. He wanted the sweet stuff!)

Friends and Family

2009-06-11T13:43:00.000-07:00

I just got back last night from 10 days in Indiana. It was such a great time visiting friends and family. Rachel and the kids are still in Nappannee hanging out with her parents until June 23rd. I had to go to the grocery store today and felt completely helpless. I was on the phone with Rachel the whole time asking what to get and where to find it. I am such a loser...ha! I could spend so much of my time writing about how much fun we had and how great it was to spend some quality time with our family and friends but that would take way too long. I will just say that I deeply cherished the time we spent with family and friends and that we miss them all so much. I'm thankful for family and friends who love us so much that they pray for us, feed us, house us, invest in us, and believe in us so much. That gives us confidence and encouragement as we press on towards the goal carrying on the mission of Jesus in Eugene. It is often difficult being so far away from family and friends, especially when we have such good relationships with one another. If you are reading this post, please know that we love you very much and we are so thankful for your prayerful, relational, and spiritual investment into our lives and into our new church. We covet your prayers so much and consider you all very much a part of what we are doing here in Eugene. That's all I have for now. I just wanted you all to know that we had a such a great time seeing everyone and have many special memories from our time back home again in Indiana. I will post some pictures of our recent trip home when Rachel and the kids get back!

Clint

Recent Events...

2009-05-21T00:26:00.000-07:00

We've been having fun with our friends!
Jael's Birthday

At the Dunes

Picnic in the park

Random thoughts!

2009-05-05T08:56:00.000-07:00

I haven't written lately so I just wanted to say hello to all those that read this blog somewhat consistently. My family has been here now for 5 months. I can't believe how fast the first 5 months have flown by. Looking back, I am really amazed at how much has happened in that time. For starters, our family has met some really neat friends who live in our same apartment complex. There are 5 little children, including Elias and Jael, under the age of 4 that play all the time together, when it's not raining of course...ha! I have found my hang out spot where I study and have formed good relationships with the staff there. I just started my new part-time physical therapy job last week and I'm hoping I'll meet some new friends there. Our church family is continuing to be intentional in building friendships and spending quality time with each other and our new friends. We continue to gather on Wednesday nights to study the Scriptures and pray. We are beginning a study of Mark 1:14-18 and spending the next 3 months discussing the gospel. Our church has linked up with a Kingdom minded ministry in Eugene that works with the poor and homeless and have been able to join in to what they are doing for the 'least of these' in Eugene. That's just a snap shot!

I am very excited about how God has moved since we've been here, yet I know that we have much room for growth, namely in the area of prayer. Why is it that we talk so much about prayer but have such a difficult time actually praying? At least that's the way it is for me. I really think God is lovingly forming us into a praying church during this season of our church plant. Not that we don't pray, but that we live and understand the mission out of an overflow of prayer. That every decision we make and every relationship we're in is bathed in prayer. Prayer that God would lead us by His Spirit. Prayer that God would continually prepare our hearts for the mission. Prayer that God would soften the hearts of our friends. Prayer that God would open doors for us to share the gospel. Prayer that God would give us courage to walk through the doors when they open. Prayer that we would never be ashamed of the gospel. Prayer that God's Kingdom would come, that God's will would be done, in Eugene as it is in Heaven.

I think being on mission is becoming all things to all people (1 Cor 9:22-23) but if that's not led by the Spirit and bathed in prayer, then it is devoid of God's power. Being here for 5 months now, I can say with 100% certainty that we NEED God's power to plant this church. I might have known that intellectually before I came, but I'm understanding it experientially now. I'm just thankful that God is patient enough with me in the process. What an amazing God we serve!

Clint

Roots

2009-05-05T08:13:00.000-07:00

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water,
that sends out its roots by the stream.

It does not fear when the heat comes;
it's leaves are always green.
It has no worries in the year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."
Jeremiah 17:7-8

Oftentimes, when I find myself in a bit of a drought, I waste a lot of time in my own mind, in wonder, and in fear. I sit and wait, expecting an "ah-ha" moment to magically enter my thoughts. And, God is gracious enough to plant those thoughts, even in the midst of my distrust; but, sometimes I don 't recognize or receive it. I have recently found myself in this position. I've been sitting and waiting for an "ah-ha" thinking that it would come from my own thoughts and will power. At last it came. My big "ah-ha" moment came as a subtle reminder that being consumed by my own thoughts has never done me any good---perhaps I should seek my guidance, hope, and instruction from the Bible! AH-HA! God always speaks there, right?!

So, yet again, I have begun to seek rather than sit. And, the verse above is what I received. I suppose we've all found ourselves in some sort of drought. It can be so many different things and come in so many different ways. However, what's the same is that in the middle of the drought, God remains. He continues to have a plan; to pursue us and remain faithful. No matter how dry and desolate circumstances may seem, God is hope. He has always and will always remain a God of love and provision who truly desires the best for us all. He is trustworthy.

Beautiful blessing

2009-04-14T16:53:00.000-07:00

I am someone who has been involved with church stuff ever since I was a baby. Started to get more involved during my high school years and I continued to be drawn to Jesus in college, which leads me today. I started to get involved with a house church (hc) with Common Ground. I stayed with one group for 3ish years and saw a lot of people come in and out of it. It was a really good place for me. For the past month or so I've been thinking about my experience in hc in Indy and my experience so far in eugene. How do you combine those two things?

For the time I was in my hc I was really focused on that group. I was going to college and still had my college friends, but slowly I started to spend a lot of time with my hc. But I think I started to get a little too comfortable in that space. And God started to direct me elsewhere. My time with my hc was what I needed during that time and season I was in. It was not a waste. We need to be in community with people who love Jesus. But I think back to those times and then think of where I am now.

I'd love to see my new friends join us for Wednesday and worship with us. My heart desires and aches for that. But I know I am not in control of that (thank goodness). I know that I need to sometimes be uncomfortable and love people that are not always like me. I loved my hc in Indy, but I need to branch out more then I did back then. I need my community, all the eugene team, but I need my friends outside of it. I realize how comfortable I get if I just focus inwardly. So it's a balance. I could not survive with out the eugene team fighting for me through prayer and support and I could not see the raw beauty of God like I do in my friends that don't follow Jesus. I would miss out on a lot of beautiful moments only God could orchestrate.

So my prayer for all of us is to step outside of our "group" and get to know some people who are not like us. When we do we will be absolutely amazed at who Jesus is. I learn so much about Jesus from the people who aren't involved with "church" and/or "religion". I know that God has comforted me while I've been out here in eugene by using my friends who are not involved with "church". That puts tears to my eyes just thinking about. I wish I could express to you just how much that means to me. What a beautiful blessing.

Much love,
Stacie :)

Easter Weekend

2009-04-12T14:22:00.000-07:00

This weekend we had a cookout at Alton Baker Park and invited friends from the library, running group, work, and where ever else we've met people. This is a time we would normally be with family so it was fun to have a bit of the mid-west with us... even if it was just cornhole and wiffleball. It was fun to get people together to eat and play. Sunday morning we got together and had communion at one of our service sites, aka- Clint and Rachel's apt.

The beauty of a child!

2009-04-09T14:31:00.000-07:00

So I just need to take a minute to brag about my children. I hope you don't mind me doing so! A few weeks ago Rachel and I and the kids were eating lunch. Rachel and I were having a conversation about theology and the church. Elias began talking when he heard us talking and so we asked him what he had to say. And he said, "I think God died so he can rescue people." I about started to cry right then and there. I can assure you that Rachel and I had not said anything about that in our conversation at that time. Since then, I have written Elias' quote down and put it on our refrigerator like any good parent does...ha! It's so beautiful when a 3 year old gets the simple truth of the Kingdom of God. Maybe that's why Jesus said we must change and become like little children in order to enter the Kingdom of God.

Now, I don't want to leave Jael out. For the last few weeks our church has been navigating through the Lord's Prayer. So Rachel and I began reciting the Lord's Prayer with Elias each night before he went to bed. Elias picked it up pretty quickly and can recite it easily now. But Jael would often times be in the room when we would practice it with Elias. She is beginning to say a few words now but we didn't think she could say what she did one night about 2 weeks ago. We were getting ready to say our bedtime prayers with our children when Jael began reciting the Lord's Prayer. She got all the way through 'give us today our daily bread.' Again, I think I about started to cry. Rachel and I couldn't believe it. We didn't even know she had been listening each night as we practiced the Lord's Prayer with Elias. Well, 2-3 days later she recited the entire thing. Unbelievable! The funny thing is, she doesn't articulate the words real well, but I know exactly what she's saying. In saying that, I'm pretty sure I sound the same way when I pray, and I'm grateful that God knows exactly what I'm saying.

Our family and our church are doing well in Eugene. We would continue to ask for you to pray for our church. Please be asking God to draw hearts to himself. Please pray that we would be sensitive to his leading and that we would live out the words of 1 Peter 3:15 "But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect." (1 Peter 3:15)

Clint

Simple

2009-03-30T21:52:00.000-07:00

"Do you have a light?
No, sorry, I don't have one.
Can I ask you a honest question?
Sure, go ahead.
What do you think about God?
Well, I think a lot of things; He is pretty big.
Yeah, that's true."

You see, Robert Stewart asked me for a light and for about 5 minutes, he engaged in brief, but fitting conversation with me. He asked about my thoughts on God and religion. He stated that he has faith, in fact, he claimed he had not only faith, but knowledge too. As he was leaving he said, "Keep the faith. It's not about the quantity of life, but the quality. It's that simple. My name is Robert Stewart. You know, like Martha, but I'm Robert. She's got the money and I've got bottles and cans (as he points to the cart he has attached to his 10-speed). Keep the faith. See you around."

Recently, I have been desiring to strip away the complexities of life. The drive for success, the need for material possessions, the craving for a higher number in the checking account; these are being challenged. It's a good feeling, actually, to be relieved of this need for stuff. A lot has happened since being in Eugene that has frustrated the societal norm of success. A lot is still happening, for the better I think. I was talking with Staci tonight and I was saying how relevant the Gospels really are in this time. Often it is easy to think, "Yeah, they are great to study, but they did occur 2,000 years ago." But there is more to it than context and chronology, or else they wouldn't be so transcendent. As I think about the ministry of Jesus, I realize that He had no possessions, no home, and no savings account. Oh yeah, neither did those other 12 guys that tagged along. Yet, they ate, were clothed, and had places to stay. Certainly, I must work and earn enough to pay the bills, support my family, and go to the grocery every now and then. But maybe there is something to be learned about the absence of excess. I haven't figured out what exactly that is yet, but Staci and I are willing to journey through it. I have been reading a book by Donald Miller called "Through Painted Deserts," one I have read before, but have a new look on it now. In it, he talks about the societal pressure to have stuff and maybe that not being the way it was intended by our Creator. He writes, "And maybe when a person doesn't buy the lies anymore, when a human stops long enough to realize the stuff people say to us to part with our money often isn't true, we can finally see the sunrise...and know, this is what I was made to do. This is who I was made to be , that life is being given to me as a gift, that light is a metaphor, and God is doing these things to dazzle us" (p. 77).

I didn't initiate the conversation between Robert and I, but I am sure glad it happened. I certainly do not have it all figured out, but I hope that I am beginning to understand the thankfulness of having just bottles and cans.

D

Living in Eugene

2009-03-19T13:05:00.000-07:00

I love this city. It's good for me to be here.

I don't worry about the same things as I did when I was living in Indy. People don't really care what you look like. Any outfit, and I honestly mean any outfit, is acceptable here. No one looks at anyone different. You can go into some of the restaurants downtown and you will find so many different people crammed into a little building. Some of the best places to go here in eugene are also the smallest, go figure. I find that people are friendly, will talk to you if you talk to them, and the pace of life is so much slower. People are really trying to take advantage of the present life. People like to get out and experience as much as humanly possible.

God is so present here in this city. I'm so blessed to be able to partake in what He is already doing. He's one step ahead of us, watching out for us, and guiding us.

Much love,
Stacie :)

Goodbye Eugene...

2009-03-12T21:19:00.000-07:00

Maybe it's that Eugene doesn't need you...
Rather, you need Eugene.

I will never forget these words spoken by Larry Mitchell on a building-top in Toronto this past summer. It seemed like a great idea, and I felt like I should embrace it. So I did...I thought.

I arrived to Eugene August 9, 2008 eager to take on the world, or Eugene, or...I was just plain eager. I knew God was doing something cool in our lives back in Indianapolis, and I was certain He'd continue out in Eugene. He didn't disappoint. In these past several months, I have experienced hurt, joy, laughter, friendship (like the real kind), community (also...like the real kind), blessing, fear, love, and the list goes on. I can't always say that I've felt close to God, but I am certain He was not far. God has continued to purify my heart, making me into something more useful for His Kingdom.

Tonight is my last evening here in Eugene, and it stings a bit. It doesn't sting with regret, guilt, or fear of making a wrong decision; rather, it stings with leaving a city that has loved me well. I set out on this mission to love the people of Eugene as accurately as I knew how, but I'll admit, I've learned more about "loving" from the people here than I was actually following through on the action. My colleagues at work have rallied around me through hard days, and willingly shared in my joys. My community has reached out to me when I needed it...like REALLY needed it...and has taught me how to be a brother in Christ. My friend Mike has not only helped me realize my own discriminatory heart, but has been relentless in his pursuit for our friendship. Eugene has loved me well.

I am a transformed son of God because He has allowed me to struggle through these times of unfamiliarity, loneliness, and culture shock. He has orchestrated such beautiful friendships, conversations, and situations to allow me to see that there may be more about me or my life or this world that I've been missing for 24 years. In the past week, I've had the opportunity to travel to northern California to see the mammoth redwoods, to the Pacific coast to see sculpted rock formations, and to Crater Lake to see a pristine lake 6 miles across, and God has been speaking one resounding message to me...I'm small. I'm not insignificant to the Kingdom, but Eugene is going to be fine without me. This church body is going to be fine without me. Center Point School is going to be fine without me.

And, so, with a grateful heart, I say goodbye to the very city that was willing to welcome me in. Thank you to all who have prayed for us out here. Please continue to battle for Clint, Rachel, Stacie, CJ, Staci, Derek, Sarah, Drew, Elias, and Jael through your prayers. This is right, and they are the right people for this city.

I love you all,
Colby

Refreshed...

2009-03-06T01:23:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I forget how amazing this state is, being cooped up in the apt all week (I work from home). I took a little road trip to the coast last weekend. Just me, my ipod, and my camera. Here's a few things I saw.

How do you get the tiny saddle on?

Jellyfish at Oregon Coast Aquarium in Newport

Cape Blanco

Heceta Head (my favorite place)

Yaquina Head Lighthouse

Bridge in Newport

View from highway 101

I heart Oregon. Just for the record.

-Cj

The rain has begun

2009-02-25T08:44:00.000-08:00

Hello to all our friends in the midwest and other places of the world that read this blog. :) It's starting to really feel like we live in a rainy state. It's been raining basically off and on during the past 3 days! When looking at the weather update it just says rain for the 10 day update except for one day, ha.

One funny story...well, it might just be funny to me. Yesterday, Jess, CJ, and myself went to watch the guys play dodgeball. That's not the funny part, but shoot I wish you guys could come experience them playing that sport! :) As we were driving we (well mostly Jess and me) were all just talking about frustrations and letting some steam out. Then we get to the parking lot of where we need to be which was pretty interesting. CJ saw a spot and we were rejoiced. Well the spot where she parked at was basically over a gigantic puddle. I was pumped about getting out because I had my rain boots on (smart me, go me!). Jess made it out safely, but CJ was on the side where the water was WAY deeper. I checked it out, played in the water, and told CJ that it would probably be best if she crawled over to the passenger side to get out of the car because her shoes sure weren't going to make that HUGE puddle (maybe she should invest in rain boots, haha). So CJ gives me her purse, which I couldn't figure out how to grab because I was already gripping much needed coffee in both hands. CJ finally just gave me her purse and she closed her door. I proceeded to stop playing in the water and went on the sidewalk by Jess. We laughed and were friendly observers of CJ's mad skills of climbing over the seat to get out of the passenger door. She made it and conquered the puddle on that side! HOORAY!

I only say this slightly irrelevant, useless story that might not really make you laugh only to say that I needed it. My frustrations and everything else just disappeared during that moment. We need people in our life to have fun with, to laugh with, and to experience life with. :)

Much love,
Stacie :)

Living out our "thank you"...

2009-02-12T11:46:00.001-08:00

This past week Rachel and I took Elias and Jael to a pizza place which had a big indoor play area. The play area had slides, video games, a merry-go-round and a maze filled with tubes (like you'd see at a McDonalds or other fast food restaurants) but only so much bigger. In addition it had a big netted pit filled with little balls that kids could jump in and play in. Needless to say, we didn't spend a lot of time eating! As soon as Elias was done with his pizza he was ready to go and play. So we got everything cleaned up and entered the chaos. There were easily 35-40 children in there running, playing, and screaming. Elias didn't waste any time and went sprinting to the pit of balls and jumped right in. Then he went to the maze, then down the slide, then back to the pit, then back to the maze...you get the point. Jael didn't waste any time either. She went right to the merry-go-round, then to a smaller slide, then to the maze, then down the big slide (hilarious...), then to the pit, then to the merry-go-round again. It was so much fun watching them just play and enjoy this enormous play room. We probably spent nearly 45 minutes there. Rachel and I had so much fun just watching our children play and enjoy where we had taken them. As I was driving home that night an interesting thought came to my mind. I told Rachel that I didn't even care if Elias and Jael didn't verbally say "thank you" to us for taking them there. For me, watching them have so much fun and enjoying where we had taken them was all the "thank you" I needed. I wonder if that thought was a glimpse of God's perspective (that seems to happen to me a lot now that I have children). I wonder if the best "thank you" to God is simply living life to the full. Jesus said "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." That's what my heart yearns for, to live life to the full the way Jesus did. To enjoy living into His kingdom here on this earth as an expression of my gratitude for His glory, goodness, and mercy. What better "thank you" is there!

Therefore, I urge you, brothers (and sisters), in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Romans 12:1

Blessings!

Clint

2009-02-01T23:39:00.000-08:00

Some things I love about my church: Derek's fire and hardworking energy toward what he desires this church to be. Rachel's questions that are so sharp, and always make me think of new things. Drew's love of his church members, and how he defends them. Clint's comments that seem to fit just at the right moment. Stacie's rambling circle talk, that makes me think in about 12 directions at the same time. Elias' voice changes when he gets so excited about something. Sarah when she pushes through her discomfort. Karyl's wit that fits in perfectly to make me laugh a lot. Staci's struggles and emotions that she goes through on the behalf of others. Jael's love of the simple things in life like fun ice cream glasses and her toothy grin. Colby's ability to love with quality, not worrying about quantity. Jenny's presence...even though she's far away she still feels here.

Richard

2009-01-29T16:27:00.000-08:00

He wore a navy blue hat and a cardboard sign. His face was speckled with salt & pepper whiskers and he held a dark, wooden cane at his side. He stood very still, as a statue, near the busy road. He seemed to stare off a bit, but it felt he was looking directly into me and piercing my heart. He spoke very sincerely and had a genuine tenderness that exuded from him. His hug radiated a warmth that stirred my spirit.

His name is Richard. He needs you to pray for him. Please, pray for him.

Go Ducks!

2009-01-29T10:47:00.000-08:00

First of all let me begin by officially saying "hello" from Eugene. My parents, older sister, and I arrived in Eugene on Jan 2nd and Rachel and the kids and Rachel's parents arrived on Jan 9th. It was the first time Elias and Jael flew on an airplane and they did great. So that is beautiful. We had a great time with both of our families being here and were extremely sad to see them go. We miss them dearly already. But we are acclimating to life in Eugene now. We are very happy with our apartment. I have successfully hung all the necessary pictures and shelves which has made Rachel very happy. And I've always said, "A Happy Wife is a Happy Life." The kids have acclimated well to sharing a room. Usually Elias is pretty tired by around 8:30 at night and could go to bed pretty easily but Jael is quite the talker and usually stands up in the crib jumping and yelling "Elias" until she gets bored and eventually lays down. Needless to say, each night is an adventure. We love being close to the rest of our church. We can get to anyone's house in less than an 8 minute walk. It has been really fun to acclimate back into the life of our church family. I've been riding my bike or walking everyday into downtown where I spend most of my days getting a feel for the city of Eugene and thinking about the church plant. I've been telling Rachel how much I want to know everything about the city and the people right now. You would think that after 9 months of waiting for our house to sell I would learn something about patience and waiting on the Lord. I know I have been formed and have learned to wait but I continue to feel like a kid in the candy store. But you know, the fact that I'm ok with the tension between the two (the slow process of learning about the culture and feeling like a kid in the candy store) reminds me that I have been formed....and am continuing to be formed. I'm thankful that God has wired me the way I'm wired and am thankful that He continues to invite me into further formation into his glorious image. What a beautiful invitation!

Clint

I don't know

2009-01-25T21:43:00.000-08:00

So.... I haven't had anything super inspiring to say...and so you haven't heard from me in awhile. So I'm going to ask a question. I want to know where and how you feel closeness with God. And I realize as a grammer teacher now,...there's no question mark in that. I think I feel God the most when I am alone in nature...but I forget that and spend a lot of time without that element in my life. So I want to be able to encourage you to spend that time with God where you feel Him or Her or It or Them the most. Where is that? Sarah

A good reminder

2009-01-14T18:10:00.000-08:00

Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you...
Psalm 55:22

For the rest of my life, the week prior to my dad's death will be hard for me. That "week" is currently this one.

I'm not alone in my suffering for each one of us has a lot of suffering and hardships that we deal with every day.

So I will choose to cast my burdens, my life, my heart, to God...i believe he will sustain me! It was a good reminder for me to receive that verse during this week.

Much love,
Stacie :)

Short and Sweet

2009-01-14T17:08:00.000-08:00

I am thankful that I'm incapable (a line from a song that I cannot name) of foreseeing the future and of making any good decision on my own. If my life was in my control I would not be thoroughly enjoying myself in a 5th grade classroom while covering a maternity leave and learning that 11-year-olds are not near as frightening as I had expected. I would not know the 26 delightful students I've now met and would not appreciate my stage of life to the extent of which I do at this moment.

I'm grateful that God is bigger than my ignorance and protects me from an non-abundant life.

A Longing

2009-01-09T10:50:00.000-08:00

To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul,
in you I trust, O my God,
Do not let me be put to shame,
nor let my enemies triumph over me.
No one whose hope is in you
will ever be put to shame,
but they will be put to shame
who are treacherous without excuse.
Show me your ways, O Lord,
teach me your paths;
guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.
Remember, O Lord, your great mercy and love,
for they are from old.
Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
for you are good, O Lord.
Good and upright is the Lord;
therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.
He guides the humble in what is right
and teaches them his way.
All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful
for those who keep the demands of his covenant.
For the sake of your name, O Lord,
forgive my iniquity, though it is great.
Who, then, is the man that fears the Lord?
He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.
He will spend is days in prosperity,
and his descendants will inherit the land.
The Lord confides in those who fear him;
he makes his covenant known to them.
My eyes are ever on the Lord,
for only He will release my feet from the snare.
Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
free me from my anguish.
Look upon my affliction and my distress
and take away all my sins.
See how my enemies have increased
and how fiercely the hate me!
Guard my life and rescue me;
let me not be put to shame,
for I take refuge in you.
May integrity and uprightness protect me,
because my hope is in you.
Redeem Israel, O God,
from all their troubles!
Psalm 25

What an amazing God we serve! It doesn't get much more beautiful than this. (Read it once more, maybe out loud)

Fight the fight

2008-12-31T13:56:00.000-08:00

Too many times I find myself getting really excited about something, an idea or a real event, so I talk about it, live it, breathe it all in, and then lose the excitement down the road. Mostly it is because it takes a lot of energy and hard work to carry through what I was most excited for in the first place.

I just got back from Indiana last night. It was a whirlwind of a trip where I saw a lot of people in a short amount of time. It was really good for me, but I did find myself surprised by what I was telling people.

I am a verbal processor when I am with a small group of people. So if you already know me you know that I can talk your ear off. I found myself talking a lot about the church plant with my friends. The thing that surprised me was my realization that I was very apathetic in a lot of ways with where the church is. To me that's a very dangerous place to be and a really easy way for Satan to come on in and destroy my excitement and joy with the church plant. So as I was processing with some friends I shared that I didn't realize how hard it is to fight for what God has placed on my heart. He brought me out here to Eugene for a reason, didn't say it would be easy, but I was obedient in the calling and went. 4 months later I am in a very lukewarm place where I was fighting the fight for the church plant. I was really good at putting excuses into play to not fight. Such as I was too busy with choir stuff, school was crazy, and everything else. Truth is, we are all really good at hiding behind the core issue of what is really deep down inside of us. Mine was my time, selfishness, laziness to fight, etc.

So my prayer is to continue to dig down in my own heart the stuff that kept me from experiencing what God wants me to experience out here. I pray that I, as well as the whole team, will not stop fighting for why we came out here. It's easy to lose sight of that when you are in the midst of it.

Much love and happy new year!!
Stacie :)

Random thoughts from Denver, CO

2008-12-29T20:15:00.000-08:00

So I'm sitting in my sister's house in Denver getting ready to watch Bourne Ultimatum. I'm not sure which of the Bourne movies is my favorite b/c I think they are all great movies. It really doesn't matter, though, because I'm spending some quality time with my parents, my sisters and my younger sister's husband Mitch. My mom, dad, older sister and I left Saturday and began the trip to Eugene, OR. I'm sure everyone reading this by now knows that we finally sold our house. We got the offer the weekend before Thanksgiving. It was crazy b/c we were one week away from taking the house off the market for the month of December. It had been on the market since late March of 2008 and we just needed a break. I think all in all we showed the house around 45 times. So the offer came at a time when we least expected. Anyway, we landed in Kansas City, KS the first night and Denver last night. We are leaving tomorrow morning again and will try to get somewhere between Salt Lake City and Boise. I don't have much to say other than it's been really good to spend some time with my family. I know that these times will be far more limited after we land in Eugene and the family returns to Indiana. I am so excited to get to Eugene and begin life there. I'm so excited to reunite with my church family in Eugene and begin living into the mission of Jesus with them there. But man, it will be tough being away from my family whom I love so much. These last few days with my family have again reminded me how much I love them and and how grateful I am for their enormous investment into my life. I'm thankful that even despite the sadness of being thousands of miles apart from my family, we will still be united in our love for each other and our common heart and passion for the kingdom of God. I guess that's it for now....it's off to Eugene!

Clint

Out for a Run

2008-12-27T13:28:00.000-08:00

There are times during my spiritual journey that I am unexpectedly overcome by amazing truths about who God is. You see, I was out for a run this morning. And what a beautiful morning it was to run. The weather was cool, but not too cold, and there was still a foggy mist that lingered in the woods of Hendrick's Park (the oldest park in Eugene). As I ran up hills and through moss-covered fir trees, I began to realize that all of this beauty is not just for me. I ran by hikers and other runners as they experienced this typical Oregon morning. I had my ipod on and a song started that almost brought me to a standstill so that I could truly meditate on the meaning of it. The song is titled "Hosea" and is sung by a folk duo, Jacob & Lily. The lyrics that captured me went like this:

"You promised me that we'd last forever,
You promised me that we'd stick together,
But your heart is wild,
And your eyes they wander,
Why do I miss you"

Here is the amazing truth that I realized after hearing these words: God is always pursuing us, He is always loving us. Even when I promise to follow Him whole-heartedly, I stumble and my eyes wander from focusing on the cross. And, even when I begin to do my own thing and try to take control of my own life, God misses me...deeply misses me, misses us. He can use a number of ways to remind us of His presence. He can use a song. He can use a beautiful morning and an old park. He can use other people. He can whisper to us through the trees. You see, our Father is always fighting for us, desiring to be in a relationship with us. And this is the story of Hosea. Hosea was a man who was cheated on by his wife and who got his heart broken countless times. But, God tells him to go and redeem his wife from the life she is living. He says to love her as much as he did when he first met her and to forgive her for the hurt she has caused, and to be married to her for the rest of his life. God is always pursuing us. More than anything He wants us to feel His love and to rest in it. I realize that I may not always live up to my promise of sticking with God, but I am thankful for morning runs through mossy trees.

Derek

How I ended up in this deal

2008-12-22T00:43:00.000-08:00

I'm watching Jack Van Impe (I mean there's not much on at 12:30 Sunday night) Sometimes I wonder what the "good tv christians" are doing and saying. You know the squeaky clean, white, married couples in slightly out of date suites rattling off verse after verse trying to convince people about Jesus. Nothing personal against them- I think they are trying to do good. But, I just.... they really just make me want to cry. Really- I mean, I think about how many people are out there who have no idea that there is a real God who knows and loves them, and loves them like no human ever has or will. This is a huge thing. And yet all most of them ever see of Him is random people on tv talking about a cross, blood, a manger, and spouting off verses left and right, saying they have all the answers. I see this and think about conversations I've had with people who have been hurt by the church- all of the "Christians" acting nothing like Jesus and I wonder, What chance do people have of meeting the real Jesus? It seems hopeless to me many days, if I'm honest. I know I'm supposed to say that through God anything is possible, and it is but I'm just tired of the same old answers that don't speak to the heart of my generation. Hell, I don't even know what a lot of Christians are talking about anymore. It sounds like a lot of people trying to make themselves sound smart when all it does is push people away.
I know that's incredibly simplified and generalized but I just sick of stupid crap getting in the way of people seeing God. Anybody with me? (I know you're out there!)
Love God.
Love people.
Seriously, let's do it.

-Cj

White Elephant Psych Out

2008-12-12T22:49:00.000-08:00

So we did a white elephant gift exchange with some of the mid-western collection of friends we have here. As we waited for Stacie to get back from choir, we wrapped up stuff from her room as our gifts and waited to see how long it would take her to realize it was all her stuff. Hilarious! Anyway we then did a real one. It wasn't AS funny but it was still very fun. Above is the picture with our stuff. Please note the senior pictures of Drew.
It is hard sometimes to be away from friends and family but we really are having fun with our new friends and I'm excited about new holiday traditions as we settle into Eugene and make it our home.
-CJ

Time still goes on

2008-11-26T08:19:00.000-08:00

Most of us out here will be experiencing our first holiday away from Indiana this year. I know that will bring different emotions throughout the next few days. You never really know how you are going to deal through a situation until you brace yourself and go through it.

I was having dinner with some of my choir friends on Monday night and one of the ladies told me that she is extremely stressed out. We talked about it for awhile and how extra holiday stuff and work have just gotten to her. But then she surprised me with a beautiful comment. She said "Time still goes on..."

I couldn't agree with that more. Even though we are far away from the ones we love and who we have developed relationships with, time still goes on. But we are not alone. The beautiful picture of community is going to be happening tomorrow. People will be meeting each other and sharing food with one another. Tomorrow is just a small portion of what my heart aches for, community and relationships.

Even though I won't be making a trip to Indiana for this Thanksgiving, I will not be alone. I have a group of people who love me right here in Eugene. Tomorrow is just a small glimpse into living in community. It is something we want to strive to live in not only on special holidays, but everyday. Jesus did not intend for us to be alone.

Pray for us as we live into what it means to be thousands of miles away from family and friends during this holiday season. And say a moment of prayer for all of your friends, who you don't know and do, who may find themselves to be alone and lonely during this holiday season. I do not believe the Kingdom is meant to be living under that. The thief does come to steal and destroy and I will continue to pray against that.

Our hearts are thankful for all of our friends and family far away. We do miss and love you.

Time still goes on...

Much love,
Stacie :)

A Glimpse

2008-11-19T23:29:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I saw Jesus smile at me. Well, not literally, well maybe literally. I mean, He wasn't next to me, I had my eyes closed. Actually, I will just try to explain it a little here. We had Church tonight and we began with some worship music. As the singing began I closed my eyes and pictured something. I caught a glimpse of what Jesus might have looked like in His candid times with His disciples. I pictured a man who loves His followers so much. And, for some reason, I pictured Jesus looking back at His Twelve as they walked behind Him and He was smiling, in fact, He is laughing. He is so happy that these men are walking with Him, that they decided to follow Him, listen to His message, and that they are prepared to share it with the world. Oh how I long for the day I get to sit and laugh with Jesus. He is my friend, just one of the guys, you know. But more than that, He is our Redemption. He has saved us all from our struggles, our trials, our complicated life. What joy we have because of Him! We are free because of Him! I often wonder what the scene would be like, being in His presence. What is great is that we are sharing in that now as His Church. Jesus, the man I see laughing, joking, and enjoying His time with the disciples is the same Jesus who eagerly awaits fellowshipping with us in Heaven. Man how my spirit longs for that day! But, I know that He wants me to carry out His teachings here in Eugene for now. He wants me to communicate to others His love, His desire to know them, and His character. I desire for people to see the Jesus I see. I see Jesus as someone who loves me dearly and wants more than anything for me to join Him at the Great Banquet. I feel like I am going to break into the classic Sunday school song,
"Jesus loves me this I know,
this I know,
this I know,
Jesus loves me this I know,
because the Bible tells me so."
Truly though, I know He loves me, not just because of the Bible, but also because in the moment of me closing my eyes, I catch a glimpse of Him looking back at me...smiling.

Derek

An interesting thought...

2008-11-12T11:39:00.000-08:00

So today I had the opportunity to spend some time with Jeff, the lead pastor of Common Ground Christian Church. It's always good to sit and rap with him because he always seems to have such good insight. We spent some time processing the reality that our house hadn't sold yet and how it was pretty frustrating for Rachel and I. I described to him how I had disengaged in many ways from life in Indy over the last 2-3 months in light of the expectation that I would soon by in Eugene, or so I thought, and how difficult that had been on me because I would seemingly get my hopes up with each showing on our house only to be let down each time. I shared with him how that had taken a toll on me and that I had recently asked God to give me the grace to engage here and be fully present in Indy until we were released from here. It has been really good to experience God's intervention. I still desire so much to be with my church body in Eugene but the calling is to be continually investing into the kingdom in Indy until God releases us.

After talking about this a little, Jeff said it is similar to how the church should be living on earth in light of the hope of our heavenly dwelling. The church should always have in sight their heavenly dwelling while in their earthly dwelling. In all reality, our hope of a heavenly dwelling should compel us to live more fully into the kingdom while in our earthly dwelling. Paul talks about this earthly and heavenly distinction in 2 Corinthians 5. Specifically in vv. 6-9 Paul says:

Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it.

As I pondered this passage later in the day, I was drawn specifically to verse 9...so we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. Let me just share one question, one observation, and one "so what." The question is this, what does it look like in my life, in your life, and in the life of our church to please God? The observation from this passage is that as Christians it will eternally be our goal to please him. Paul says whether we are at home in the body or away from it.. Pleasing God isn't something we will do only on earth, but for all eternity. The "so what" for me is will I make it my goal to please him whether in Indy or Eugene, whether everything is going my way or life is coming apart all around me, whether I've got plenty or am in need, you get the point. What is the "so what" for you? What is the "so what" for our church? How are you (and we as a church) coming along at making it our goal to please him, ......whether.....or....?

I love you guys and am praying for you!

Clint McKinnis

Dream dreams

2008-11-05T15:03:00.001-08:00

I have had beautiful moments with God this week. Last week we were talking about what we could do as a church. I mentioned how lately I have had it on my heart to walk the streets of Eugene like I used to do when I volunteered at Outreach, Inc. in Indy (outreachindiana.org). I experience more of Jesus and the church when I am among people.

A year ago I was telling a friend what would happen if people that followed Jesus started to dream dreams that are bigger then them? That of course only led to more questions. Would the world change? Would our hearts start to transform more into who God wanted us to be? Would we start to see the Church as an everyday thing rather then a one day of the week thing? Can we stop and take God out of our box that we created for Him? Those questions still challenge me today and only lead me to more and more questions...

I daily drive by people that are on street corners holding up signs saying "need help" or "any spare change?" and my heart breaks. And when my heart breaks I start to pray. And those prayers aren't always the normal prayers and usually happen in the privateness of my own heart. My mood challenges the prayers for sometimes I pray with anger and other times I pray prayers of deep compassion for my neighbors on the street.

I want to share something with you about what God has placed on my heart and how sometimes I feel insignificant to do it. I really feel like I need to be walking the streets. Then I thought well I could bring some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with me. And all of this has stemmed from seeing the signs on the street with my neighbors and friends holding the signs. I shared this with the team and they thought it was a good idea. And I was surprised by how God has already gone before me in this. Sarah said we should bring socks! It's a dream I have...to see people not holding signs on the side of the street. And it's something that God has poured into my heart. Reread the first sentence of this paragraph. I used the word insignificant. I find that word stops me from being used by God and my dreams from becoming a reality. So I fight that and am willing to risk whatever it takes to follow the dreams God places on my heart.

I share all of this to you to not tell you how awesome and mighty I am, because that would be a lie. Reread how I called myself insignificant. But Jesus uses us like he used his disciples. They were ordinary people like you and me and learned how to dream dreams that were bigger then them. It took time, a lot of risks, and faith. They messed up, picked themselves up again, and were continually following what was on their hearts.

I pray you will dream dreams that are bigger then you and see just what Jesus can do in this world.

Much love,
Stacie :)

Edit: One of the best things about living in community is seeing one of your dreams become the dreams of others. It's neat to see God going before us in everything that we do.

Psalm 143

2008-10-31T15:51:00.000-07:00

Hello friends! I hope all is going well for you in Eugene. I had such a great time seeing you all 3 weeks ago. It was such a refreshment for Rachel and I. Unfortunately, I have found the air slowly leaking out of my balloon since leaving. What an interesting season that we all are in right now. I'm sure that God is forming us in ways that we could never have expected. My prayer, even though it seems to be rare and often spoken without much confidence, is that I would be faithful....that WE would be faithful to the call. The call to love God and people in the way of Jesus. To so faithfully believe that God has birthed that mission on our hearts for Eugene that nothing would deter us. That our passions, though they manifest themselves in a variety of ways, would be used by God to foster spiritual awakening to His redemptive story. I'm thankful to be in relationship with you all and love you all very much. Know that I pray for you often and yearn for the day that we will be together.

The last two days I've really tried to drink from Psalm 143. I just thought I'd share it with you.

Clint

Psalm 143

O Lord, hear my prayer, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief. Do not bring your servant into judgment, for no one living is righteous before you. The enemy pursues me, he crushes me to the ground; he makes me dwell in darkness like those long dead. So my spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed. I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done. I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. Selah

Answer me quickly, O Lord; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit. Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God: may your good Spirit lead me on level ground. For your name's sake, O Lord, preserve my life; in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble. In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant.

Solving the world's problems...

2008-10-26T16:07:00.001-07:00

This is what Drew and I do when we get together and have a drink. You see, we are commonly misunderstood as men who just talk about sports. I mean, even if Notre Dame's football team should be ranked, I don't concern myself with being obsessive about that. And, just because the Cubs blew their chances at ending a 100 year drought, I have more important things to discuss with my Yankee-fan-friend. Okay, back to the reason for this blog post. Drew and I seem to always get going about this or that, and before you know it, we end the night with saying, "Well, we just solved some more of the world's problems, good night." In fact, just the other night we had ourselves another epiphany. We began to reflect a little on our time here (it has been nearly 3 months, holy cow!) and wondered how we were doing. Clint and Rachel were here recently and gave us some great encouragement. But, what tends to happen when you are unemployed and have no one else to talk to during the day, you begin to over-analyze, which is weird for me, right? I began to talk about our running group and that it seems like our conversations with people there have cooled a little in the past couple weeks. The obvious question I ask myself is whether it was something I said. But, if you know me, I don't say too much, so I figured it wasn't that. Then, as we dove deeper into our analytical minds, we came up with the hypothesis that maybe it was because they know we are here for a church plant and fear that we will try to convert them the more we talk to them, kinda like the Mormons that visited my apartment last week. Of course, this is not our purpose with the conversations we have. Sure, we want them to love Jesus and to experience His beautiful love and grace, but we also want to be their friends. As we continued this conversation, we started wondering what we can do to bridge the gap between thoughts of bible-thumping and wanting to befriend them. After careful logical deduction, Drew and I discovered that in the first few weeks at our running group, we were new. We were the ones who they did not know, and they did a terrific job at asking us about, well, us. We told them why we moved to Eugene, that we did not have jobs, and that we did not all live in one apartment. What we have failed to do is to return the favor. Initially, we did discover some things about our new acquaintances, but we have not done a good job at following up with them. So often, we make conversations about us, and not about who we are talking to. Whether or not we think they think we are trying to get them to our church thing does not matter. We realized as we sat in the cool Northwestern night that we need to engage them even if it means making ourselves vulnerable. Rob Bell writes in his new book, "Jesus Wants to Save Christians," that, "Remember, God is looking for a body, flesh and blood to show the world a proper marriage of the divine and human." As uncomfortable or awkward that it may be, it is our responsibility to love people as Jesus does. This means engaging them in conversation. There you have it, another of the world's problems solved, or that is what Drew and I claim at least.

Oh, a quick update: We had running group this morning, and through us being a little better at engaging people, we had some pretty good conversations. Thank God He helps us, because I could not do this on my own!

Derek (with compliments to Drew)

Hello Oregonians

2008-10-15T01:50:00.000-07:00

I would like to warn you that I have been up since 4 am, I have consumed two containers of chocolate ice cream, and I am polishing off my second pint of whole milk...so as a result I offer no guarantees that this will resemble anything close to coherent.
I would like to offer my apologies for my lack of communication with you all. When Clint and Rachel came back and told me that many of you expected more communication from the management team, I felt very convicted. As a member of the team I should be checking in with you guys much more frequently than what I have. I may be in the hospital because the lower half of my body doesnt seem to work, but emailing and calling on a phone requires only muscles above the waist. This means I could have shot you an email, posted on here, or made a phone call...and I have done none. For that I offer my deepest apologies. My cell phone number is 374-8647 and my email is rdreid7602@gmail.com. Feel free to call or email anytime that you would like.
With that said, I would like to share a story with you. The experience I have had with becoming paralyzed has been the most challenging experience of my life. However, it has also been and will continue to be the most transformational experience of my life. As you can imagine, I am much more dependent on other people right now. One of the side effects of this whole experience has been that my right hand has become significantly weaker. I do not have that much grip with it and I do not have the normal range of movement with it because of the burns. This has caused me to need other people to open a pack of ketchup, to reach certain objects, etc. I am also bed ridden most of the day. All of the stuff I use - food, the computer, my cell phone, books - are stored on tables that slide over my bed. However, often times these tables are stored outside of my reach. This requires me to call a nurse or ask someone that is in the room to push the table closer so I can reach it. I am currently allowed to sit up in a chair for 2 hours a day. The chair they are putting me in cannot be wheeled by me because it doesnt have big wheels. It has to be pushed by someone else. This means that even when I am sitting up I still need someone else to push me around. This level of dependency is EXTREMELY frustrating for me. As result, when I am in therapy, I am pushing myself really hard because I want to be more independent. I get frustrated with my progress because by this point I wanted to be able to be in my wheel chair, able to roll myself around, and not need other people as much as what I do.
I tell you all of this not to gain sympathy, of which I want none, but to say that I understand the desire of wanting things to change faster than what they are able to be changed. All of the independence I want now is going to take time and lots of effort to obtain. It is not possible for it to happen now, and in all honesty God wants it that way. The goals we set and the visions God gives us often take time to achieve. God is a god who is much more concerned with the process than the end result. God doesnt care when I become fully independent, because He wants to teach me and refine me during this process of realizing that goal.
I was reading Proverbs and came across this little gem that really sums up what I have been going through..."He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment." Working the land takes time. I have fantasies of the fast route, but God wants me to slow down and be refined by the journey.
You guys are working the land there in Eugene. I know it is easy to want things to happen fast. After all you guys are planting a church...churches are supposed to grow and yours hasnt. I think that is because God wants to spend some time working not only the soil there in Eugene but also the soil in your own hearts. I know it can be easy to have fantasies of what it could look like, but just take a while (and I am talking about months...not just 5-10 minutes) to let God do some work in you. God doesnt care about what your church looks like...He cares about refining you to be more like Him.
I havent been to a church service in months. I havent listened to a single sermon in months. I havent listened to a single worship song. Yet I have experienced church more in the past two months than any other time in my life. I have had people love on me and my family to such an extent that I have no choice but to sit back in awe. I have seen both friends and total strangers pour out of their hearts in the most profound ways. The effect it has had on me has been that it has softened my heart and caused me to want to pour into other peoples lives. God seems to use struggle and tragedy as His biggest tool to change our hearts. That is what I now understand church to be. It is living a life with other people that causes heart changes and makes you love God and other people more. This can take place with 10 people or 100.
So when you are evaluating the success of your church plant ask yourselves these questions:
Is your heart being softened or awakened in such a way that it causes you to love God and other people more?
Is your life and the way you live it, helping other people to have their hearts softened and awakened to love God and other people more?
Dont ask yourself these questions:
Have I gotten anyone saved?
Has our church grown?
Does our church plant look more like "normal" church?
Did I remember to make my bed? (why make your bed if your going to sleep in it again the next night?!?)
As an outsider looking in, it seems you are positionally exactly where God would want you to be. All of your jobs are relational. You live close to each other. You are getting involved in each others lives. You are being friendly to the people you meet and work with. What I cant judge as an outsider is where your hearts are at. It is easy to get sucked into worrying about positional type things, but my encouragement and prayer for you is that God would give you rest from worrying about those type things and instead allow you to focus on what God is doing in your heart to refine you and help you to love Him and people better.
I love you guys and am inspired by your constant desire to do what God wants you to do. Thanks for letting me journey with you.

Love,
RD

Oregon Facts:

2008-10-04T00:48:00.000-07:00

Nothing profound here... just thought it was time to list these.
FACT:
-Eugene, Oregon was named the "greenest" city in America
-You can not pump your own gas in Oregon
-You can not buy hard liquor in a grocery store. beer and wine, however is everywhere and is refrigerated for you. you can buy alcohol on Sundays, but the liquor stores close at like 8.
-Recycling is way easier here
-Nutria will steal your bread, look'em up
-There are no tornadoes and lightening is rare. forest fires, however, are normal.
-Fall lasts about 9 months
-Beer is cheaper than pop
-There is no sales tax
-Drive thru coffee stands are in parking lots everywhere
-You may get killed for saying anything negative about the Ducks (football)
-Residents of Oregon are called "Oregonians"
-There are way too many spiders here and they bit me in my sleep
-The whole town shuts down for an inch of snow
-Oregon is the only state where assisted suicide is legal. You would think people would come here as they get older instead of Florida, but whatever.
-Snails come out in the rain and no matter how many I move off the sidewalk, my neighbors still step on them :(
-There are cougars, bears, and elk. oh. my.
-Oregon has a very high homeless population and a very high unemployment rate
-You can not drive anywhere during a ducks home game
-The local news team has trouble reading the teleprompter
-You can often get plane tickets to Portland for $200 during non-holiday time (hint hint)

-Cj

Treading water

2008-09-30T18:58:00.000-07:00

I'm so wordy when I write these things, and try to sound all deep and philosophical. So I erased it. And I am trying over. How am I doing? Ha, I'm glad you asked; I'll tell ya. I'm more aware now than ever that there is a spiritual world that fights over us. I'm not saying that we have no control over our lives (although each day I'm finding that I have less control than I think). In a way, I feel very valued that two sides want me bad enough that they are fighting over me--all those gym class nightmares of being picked last are washing away:). One example...my heart was starting to hurt from work...I have this amazing job where we get to be up front with some serious needs young adults have and try to ease those needs. It's amazing. But at the same time, our hands are tied by the program. Even though I know a kid is hungry, or has no way to earn money, I can't give him mine. It is a feeling that embodies powerlessness. I was building up with that feeling until last wed at housechurch. (ps...i'm finding more and more that those subtle emotions that grow are one of the biggest warfare tricks used on me) It was the end of church, and we were praying. I didn't know a lot of what to say, it was kind of the epitamy of frusteration with God. Then He gave me this little gift while I was praying...to ask for help for my kids. I don't know why the thought hadn't crossed my mind-I'm ashamed to say that it didn't, but it was amazing how much peace was given to me in that moment of clarity. One small battle that God won.
I felt honored to be given the eyes to see that battle. Most of the time I feel very out of the loop until that whole hindsight thing kicks in. We went camping this weekend at this beautiful reservoir where the water was this amazing tropic color *c cj's photos. There was a point when we were all settled and exploring the landscape. There was a bay, and D was navigating the terrain around it and was halfway around to the other side. Well, my adventure itch kicked in, and I got the idea to swim across the bay...#1 because I wanted to see what was around the corner, #2 because I don't get to swim in mountain lakes very often and wanted to prove I could do it, and #3 I wanted to see if I could get across faster by swimming than walking around on shore. So after being wishy washy for a min. I got enough confidence from my girls and plopped in. As I was reaching halfway (with my breath being sucked out from the cold water and little waves and nervousness) I ended up doing this funky side stroke (:) I felt like my mom) and treading water thing. Ha, and you would think that treading water in the middle of a bay of cold mountain lake water, as you start to get doubts and wonder why the heck you are so crazy, you would think that it would be a foreign feeling. Nope. How much of my life do I feel like I am treading water, oblivious to the bigger picture, just trying to make it across. And then as little cold waves get a little to close to comfort to your breathing, you start to panic.
I don't really know what all of this means, as Stacie would say, I am word vomiting. I know reading long blogs can be tiring:) so I thank you for putting up with me. I didn't want the tone of this to be negative, cause I think that it's amazing all the things that I am learning...number one, that I'm really glad I jumped in. Thank you for encouraging me to "jump".
Sarah

Beautiful Inconvenience

2008-09-29T14:19:00.000-07:00

This weekend we took a camping trip and, by mistake, stumbled across an utterly breath-taking site. Initially we had set out to discover a spot that was suggested to us by someone else. In the process we found ourselves passing roads, making U-turns and wondering where in the heck this place could be. We of course had all the useful tools: maps, GPS system, and all things necessary to make you feel secure in an unknown place. But, even still we never found the place for which we’d set out. However, we did discover something more, something greater, something more beautiful than what we had imagined at the start of our journey.

I find such experiences popping up often in my life. I have a plan and begin to run myself ragged in pursuit when all of the sudden, when I feel completely of course, I am slapped in the face with His far more beautiful plan that leads me through a variety of different steps along the way (Proverbs 16:9). These steps are at first unwelcome and seem quite inconvenient; yet, in time, prove to be for my benefit and typically far beyond all I’d hoped and imagined (Ephesians 3:20-21). In the midst, I often find myself refusing to fully live into this truth (I’m sure no one knows what I’m talking about ;) ). I know it and want to believe it, but must also allow the process to take its course in my heart in order for the glory to go to God rather than…me.

I am beginning to listen to the subtle reminders to smile upon the unwelcome "inconveniences" and allow Him to free me from myself, my plan. It’s a lifetime commitment and process. But, worth it, no doubt.

Staci

The Invitation!

2008-09-26T11:33:00.000-07:00

So my hot wife surprised me with one of the best birthday gifts of my entire life the other week. As I began to open what I thought was a shoe box with a new pair of shoes, I quickly realized it was just a diversion tactic to make me 'think' it was a new pair of shoes. Inside the box was a letter that said "Happy Birthday! Your birthday gift is a weekend adventure of whitewater rafting in West Virginia." I was freakin' out! What a wonderful gift. Rachel thought it would be good to get my mind off the fact that our house still had not sold and this would be the perfect adventure. She couldn't have been more on point. So my wife and I and the kids left that weekend and took off for West Virginia to tackle one of the world's best whitewater rafting trips, the Upper Gauley. You can google it if you want, but it is one of the most dangerous whitewater rafting trips in the world. There are over 40 rapids including 5 class V which are the toughest. As a matter of fact, one of the class V is called "Pillow Rock" and is the most photographed class V rapid in the world. So needless to say, this trip was amazing. It was an incredible adventure filled with easy waters and hard waters, laughter and fear, messing up and learning from our mess ups, falling out and getting back in, and so forth. Two things really struck me throughout this trip. One was the extreme importance of listening to our guide who was in the boat with us. He had been down the river numerous times and knew what He was doing. If we just followed his lead, everything was going to be cool regardless of what we faced. The other was that I got to share this adventure with my wife. Sitting next to her on the boat and experiencing the adventure with her with all it's unpredictability was so much better than if I had done it by myself.

Dallas Willard writes in his book, The Divine Conspiracy, "Jesus has invited us to make a pilgrimage - into the heart and life of God." The journey into the heart of life of God is nothing short of the greatest adventure we will ever be invited into. The adventure God invites us into leads to abundant life, just as God designed. No doubt there are times of easy and hard waters, laugher and fear, falling down and getting back up, but it's all a part of the adventure. Through it all we are formed into the image of God, which has always been our destiny. There are two things that stand out regarding the invitation. One is that it's accepted and embraced by following Jesus. Jesus' simple, yet life changing call throughout the gospels is to "follow me." Following Jesus is the collision of faith and obedience. The two can not be separated. We are beckoned to keep our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who perfectly demonstrated the life God intended for us to live and invites us to walk in his footsteps. The other reality is that the adventure is maximized when we share it with others. It's not that we "have" to experience the adventure together, we "get" to experience the adventure together. This is what the Church is all about. The people of God declaring the praises of God so that the world can see how much God loves them. Isn't the Church beautiful!!

I am so thankful that God has invited us to Himself. I am so thankful that He sent Jesus to allow us access to Himself. I am so thankful that Jesus perfectly demonstrated the life we were intended to live. I am so thankful that Jesus left his Holy Spirit to empower us to live fully into the adventure. And I am so thankful for the Church, my brothers and sisters in Christ, who I get to journey with into the heart and life of God. What an incredible God!!!!

Clint

Refreshed

2008-09-24T22:15:00.000-07:00

It was a great night of being together as a church. We just shared with each other what has been going on in our lives, where we have seen God lately, and listening. I was again reminded of John 10:10. So many times we encounter the thief who wants to come and destroy us. It can be anything in our life. For me, I just don't always recognize there is someone who is trying to come out and destroy me. I was challenged to continually remember we are at a war. Then it hit me that I feel that I am not able to live into the fullness of life that God has planned out for me unless I daily turn to Him.

(This pic is what i imagine spiritual warfare looks like. -Cj)

I love this city. It is starting to feel like home and other people on the team feel the same way. It's crazy, but we have almost been here for 2 months...WOW!!

Much love,
Stacie :)

Quiet.

2008-09-15T12:21:00.000-07:00

"That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, 'Let us go over to the other side.' Leaving the crowd behind, they took Him along, just as He was, in the boat. There were also other boats with Him. A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke Him and said to Him, 'Teacher, don't You care if we drown?' He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, 'Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?' They were terrified and asked each other, 'Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey Him!'"

As I read this passage in Mark the other day, I was refreshed beyond words. The very first thing that struck me in this story is that Jesus told the disciples that they were going over to the other side. Of course, Jesus being God knew they were in for quite the storm, but He journeyed out into the sea anyways. I think that being here in Eugene is kinda like going out into the sea. I felt the calling, and not knowing exactly what we were getting ourselves into, I followed. Now that I am here and still searching for a job, I can feel the storm raging on. Much like the disciples, I am beginning to get a little uneasy. Meanwhile, the Gospel says, Jesus was taking a nap on a cushion. I mean, who sleeps on a cushion in the middle of a storm?! And, unfortunately, much like the disciples, I am rushing over to that cushion to wake Jesus up. I want Him to help me out, to save me from this storm, to get me a stinkin' job! Of course, Jesus gets up, tells the storm who's boss, and all is calm. It is the next statement that hits me like a Mack truck, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?" Whoa. Here I am, wondering when this storm is going to subside, hoping to be saved from this "unknown," and I forgot all the while that Jesus can step in anytime and command quiet. I realize that Jesus knowingly took the disciples into the storm to test their faith. He took a nap on that cushion to further test their faith, and finally, had to prove His faithfulness by telling the storm what's up. I want to allow Jesus to take His nap. I want to wait for His timing. So here I am in this proverbial storm, waiting for the Quiet.

Joyful

2008-09-10T21:22:00.000-07:00

Well, Stacie spilled my beans:) but I have a fabulous job...and am pumped beyond words about it. I had my first day today, and I found myself thinking that this job couldn't be more perfect for me right now. The pace is so much slower than what I was doing before, and to be honest:) I find it refreshing. There is definitely a whirlwind going on around me right now...quite a change from a week ago. So I know this is short, but just wanted to tell you all in person...well, kind of in person...about this fabulous gift.
Sarah

The secret of being content!

2008-09-08T19:11:00.000-07:00

So I guess I will finally venture into the realms of "blogging." Mind you I never got better than a 'B' on any substantial paper in my life, unless of course it was a group project and someone much smarter than myself was the primary editor, like my wife in PT School. None the less, I am excited to join the club. Rachel and I and the family still reside in Greenwood awaiting the sale of our house. I've never had to wait on the Lord to this extent before. Needless to say it's a new journey filled with many life lessons and emotions. I was really convicted, encouraged, and intrigued by a particular passage yesterday as I listened during the communion meditation at church. The scriptural reference was Philippians 4:10-13 and it was verse 12 that really hit me...'I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation.' As I processed this passage later that afternoon a few questions and thoughts surfaced in my mind. What does it mean to be content? Am I content or am I always wanting something more? Why is being content important in the kingdom of God? Two words really jumped off the page, "learned" and "secret." Paul says he "has learned" the secret of being content meaning that being content is not something we get with the wave of a magic wand. Rather, it is something that is learned over time through life's ever-changing circumstances. In addition, there is a "secret" to being content. What in the world is the secret? It seems as though Paul is saying that it took times of plenty and times of need to learn this secret of being content. Maybe through all of those circumstances, Paul began to focus less on the circumstances, which were always changing, and more on that which never changed, namely Jesus. Maybe the secret is that we learn to focus less on those things we can see and more on that which we can't see. Just a note, Paul was in prison while writing this letter. So I feel kind of silly viewing this passage through the lenses of my house not selling but it's the reality of my present condition. I guess I am just asking that God uses my circumstances to teach me the secret of being content, namely that I stop focusing so much on whether or not my house is going to sell this week and start focusing on the spiritual formation into the image of Jesus. Unfortunately I can't do this on my own. Fortunately, I don't have to. For "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:13).

God Bless,

Clint

Things are good

2008-09-08T10:36:00.000-07:00

Things are pretty calm here in beautiful Eugene. We have good news with one of our team members, Sarah. Rejoice with us because Sarah now has a job being a teacher at a school called New Roads, which gears towards supporting homeless youth. She is super excited about it and so are we!

I am currently reading a book and read this passage yesterday. "The Bible has many stories about people called by God out of the familiar to an unknown land. And he promises them if they will step out on faith and live his way, he will lead them to a better land. "By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going" (Heb. 11:8) Change is frightening. It may comfort you to know, that if you are afraid, you are possibly on the right road - the road to change and growth."

I absolutely loved that passage. I hope that is encouraging for you in your life. It was definitely encouraging to me as I read that yesterday.

On a side note: CJ and I took a little road trip to the West Cascades yesterday, which were absolutely beautiful. Talk about Gods glory being shown in his beautiful creation! Here are some pictures from our adventure. (Maybe this will make you want to come out and visit the team! haha)

Much love,
Stacie :)

Let us run

2008-08-29T05:19:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying how thankful I am for this time of learning and humbling. Clint was supposed to have left with his parents for Oregon 2 days ago, our house is now listed for less than what it was when we bought it 4 years ago, and our dear friend is lying in a hospital bed in excruciating pain after yet another surgery. To say the least, nothing is going the way we planned it. We know that this is the way God usually works, right?, always orchestrating life so differently than what we see, or think we see. We are often guilty of attempting to normalize God, thinking that life should play out a certain way and questioning when it doesn't. We know that we should trust while waiting, but our heart is not always there. At some point though, we surrender...and stop doubting, stop wanting answers, stop reasoning, and we are able to praise our Lord for his unexplainable ways, his untameable ways.

Our friend in the hospital, RD, has ministered more to his visitors rather than the other way around. He is constantly showing gratitude to the nurses, even the janitorial staff. He offers life-giving words to the people around him while he fights for his life. His wife Jill has also been fighting, for joy and strength, and both have stood firm, unwavering in their faith, praising and thanking God along the way. So, let us thank God for his ways being so far from normal, and while we wait, let us run...let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us (Heb 12).

Rachel McKinnis

Waiting

2008-08-25T22:14:00.000-07:00

Waiting on the Lord...
This has been an interesting phrase that has been on my heart for the last week or so. I understand that there is trust involved in waiting on something or someone, but how does that trust continue to build when times get tough? I have always found it easy to trust God and others when things are going well or situations are falling into place the way that I invision them; I am a little nervous to pray or ask God to teach me how to trust when things are not going exactly as planned! ha ha. I think He is teaching me this now whether I asked Him to or not. Stacie Nickelson shared a verse last week at house church that has stuck with me since then... Romans 8:24-25. It is the hope for what do not yet have, and wait patiently for that makes my heart and mind rest a little. I pray that as a team and individually we truly learn what it means to Wait On The Lord!

Current.

2008-08-25T00:55:00.000-07:00

Greetings from Eugene. It is currently 12:57 a.m. and I am sitting in front of this MacBook with thoughts flowing through my mind that I can't seem to stop or even ignore to escape to my slumber.

So, I write.

I've found this blogging to be therapeutic at times; so, please excuse me while I take full advantage of this avenue of expression. I continue to sound like a broken record within my own head, questioning my purpose in Eugene. Somehow, I get swept up in this current of thoughts and feelings, and convince myself that I should doubt or feel uneasy. It would only make sense, in my finite mind, that if I am feeling peace through a time of unemployment and a decreased social network, that I have somehow missed it. I have been reading "The Shack" by William P. Young, and have learned a great deal from this brilliant, fictional story. Mack, the lead character, has built up a resistance to God because of some tragic events in his life, and has formulated questions needing answers. I know Mack. Mack is me...minus the tragic events. In this beautiful pursuit of God toward Mack, he learns of this amazing, unfailing love. All of these questions that he has angrily stashed away, come flooding out; however, it is not on his own agenda. God meets Mackenzie Phillips exactly where he stands, angry, bitter, and full of resentment.

In the same way, I feel like I've built up all of these questions here in Eugene. I want God to answer them all now, leaving out no details. Throughout the story, God appears to Mack as a glowing, older African-American woman. Now, we could probably debate at this point about God being a man or woman, but we'll save that for another time (or maybe not another time). The point of God's female appearance is that He was exactly who Mack needed Him to be. Mack needed to know that God is compassionate and gentle, much like a loving grandmother. It is also important to point out that God's purpose in all of this was to glorify Himself more through Mack's life. He works through all things to glorify Himself. That's not egocentric. That's God.

God continues to reveal Himself more fully to us, the city Eugene, and the whole world. He meets us where we're at for His sake and for His glory. Isn't it beautiful? Please continue to pray that we will get lost in God's current, taking us wherever He wants us to be.

Sleep awaits. Goodnight.

colb

Cheap Reminder

2008-08-21T23:41:00.000-07:00

A few of us went to see the second Narnia movie today at the $1.50 place. This is the second time I've seen it. The first time was back in Indy, at a time when I was not happy about moving to Eugene. A few scenes stick in my mind...
One is where and entire army is charging across a bridge. On the other side stands Lucy, a small girl with a small dagger. She stands with no fear in her eyes as the army charges because she knows who is beside her and who is really going to fight the battle, Aslan. Lucy to me, represents faith.
The other scene only became clear today. At the end, Aslan opens a door to the other world (our world) and asks who wants to go through. At the time, I felt like I was standing at that door and had to choose whether or not I would follow what was in front of me. It was just one of those moments where I thought, "Really? Am I really going to do this?"
After seeing that movie the first time, I had a bit of a break down. I didn't want to leave my friends and family. I fought with God and I sat on a friend's porch and cried quite a bit. I had to remind myself to have faith, like Lucy on the bridge, that God knows what He is doing and I can trust Him, even if it means moving to the other side of the country.
Seeing this today, I wish I could say that it was completely different this time. I feel more like an ant with a bread crumb than a girl with a dagger- even smaller and completely ill prepared for what's in front of me. What could I possibly do here in the place with my bread crumb? Why did I move here? But yet again, I had to remember my calling, who is beside me, and who is really going to take care of everything- Liam Neeson. I MEAN- Jesus.
(That reminder only cost a dollar fifty. I have a feeling the others will not come so cheap.)
-CJ (aka Carol)

Goodness

2008-08-16T20:44:00.000-07:00

Why hello there!

So we had our first house church in Eugene last Wed. At that point I realized that I had refused to process anything really, and it definitely flooded over me. Very intensely. So I decided to process. And since then I have been denied the one job I was kind of counting on (mostly because it was the only one that I saw was available), and I started to worry about money. Which is kind of rare for me. And I hated it. I found myself in this balancing act between hoarding what money I have left for the future, and wanting to be as free with my money as I usually am. After talking with a few wiser than me people, I realized two major things. Number one, it is a balancing act, but how much am I really trusting God if I find myself trying to control my financial fate. And number two, give my time! That is something that I have so much of right now that I NEVER do. Such simple solutions.

I love God and the way He works. I was struggling because I didn't feel like I was living into who God has called me to be; I felt very much like a failure. But since realizing and processing, I feel like I've been switched on. Jobs that I normally wouldn't have thought of, but find myself passionate towards keep popping up. Mind you, I don't have one yet, but just the prospect is exciting. I went to the market today, just to hang out. It was fabulous. I've found a spot I want to be a part of. It's outside the courthouse, and almost feels like an alternative to the consumer-ness of the market. A group of guys sit around and play drums, and cowbell (which i so hoped to here more of:)) and other random instruments. Groups of kids, who seemed a little ragged, hung out with each other. A little girl sat and swapped fruit with me. Random guys were sword fighting with duct taped whiffle bats. A guy wearing just a kilt and rope shoes sat smoking through this odd shaped leather pipe for hours. Lots of weed. I had such an emotional response of joy and pain for humanity. I loved it. Sarah

A cup o' Joe, a lost application, and a parking ticket...

2008-08-16T08:45:00.000-07:00

Hey there!

Things here in Eugene seem to be heating up quite a bit. The weather has been abnormally hot the past couple of days reaching the mid to high 90's. We hear that Indiana has had some "Eugene-like weather". I can't lie; I'm a little upset about that. So...it's been a pretty busy week this past week, as searching for jobs has overtaken most of our lives. Drew, Derek, and I have managed to step away from that for a few hours to play the occasional game of frolf. We originally thought it would be good to get away from the frustration of not finding jobs just yet, but quickly realized that the frolf course out here is HARD. So, we continue to play trying to conquer what seems to be unconquerable (is that a word?).

Two days ago I decided to go downtown to have a cup of coffee at the local Starbucks because I received a gift certificate from Jenny before I left for Oregon. As I was sitting there reading outside a gentleman approached me asking for some spare change to buy a cup of coffee. Startled, I looked up to see a man dressed in dirty clothes, enveloped with a full beard, and wearing a ball cap to cover his "not-so-clean" hair. After buying him a cup of coffee in at Starbucks I invited him to sit down with me. He hesitated, but then gladly accepted. As we sat there and talked over the next hour, I learned all about Ward's family, past jobs, and current struggles. Ward is epileptic. It's hard for him to get a job because of the severity of condition. (Time out: I could sit here and type out Ward's life story, but I will not drag this out) I tell you this to share the battles that were taking place within my own heart. I sat there genuinely interested, but found myself judging whether his story was true or not. Maybe he really didn't have epilepsy... Maybe his second wife really didn't die of alcoholism... Or maybe I had painted Ward with the wrong brush. Were we all not painted with God's beautiful brush from the beginning? God has really shown me a new type of love the past couple of days. I continue to pray, and would ask for you all to as well, for a greater love for God's people here in Eugene.

After our conversation I headed over to the public library to sign up for my new library card. After I signed up, I headed up to the Internet room to finish a job application and print it off. After working on the application for about an hour I discovered my time on the computer was almost up (there was a 60 minute limit). I pressed print, and then headed over to the printer to collect my work. It didn't print. I repeated the process, but still received no results. I inquired about the status of my application if my time ran out on the computer, and the response was, "You'll lose everything." Great! This was just wonderful. After a few troubleshooting processes, the printing failed. I panicked, and then realized I was helpless. I lost it all. After talking with one of the library staff members, I started for the car. I walked out only to find a parking ticket....FOR $30!!!!! Lesson learned....don't overpark in Eugene, Oregon.

By this time I was very frustrated, and really wanted to give up for the day. I had started to believe that I would not be able to get this position because of the computer malfunction. Isn't God much larger than this? Drew and I were talking the other evening about the need for God because of the way He works through ALL things. God's going to provide jobs for us, not by our strength and timing, but by His. Please pray that we all enter into a state of submission to Him through this difficult time of finding jobs in a community whose job market is poor. We love you all, and I hope things are well back in Indiana (or wherever you're reading this from)!

-colb

Starting to feel like home

2008-08-14T15:56:00.000-07:00

Hi friends! As previously noted in the post before this one we made it to EUGENE! This is Stacie here writing to you from our lovely shaded apartment, which is GREAT because it's 98 degrees outside and the apartments here don't have air conditioning. No worries though for it does feel pretty cool inside, unless you play Dance Dance Revolution then it's just stinkin hot. ;) The picture of us girls up there are who are sharing this apartment. Sarah is on the left, CJ in the middle, and I am on the right. It's a little blurry, but it basically shows us at our finest!! Then ya got me hanging out of the truck...don't worry, I'm smart enough to know not to drive a truck like that. :) And the last picture is the view CJ got the whole journey across the US. She even had to put her hazards on going up the mountain for the good ole' Penske Truck wasn't enjoying the climb up the "hills". You would have never guessed that with the crazy fast speed of 35 miles an hour she got going up the "hills". Don't underestimate the craziness of these "hills" as they say over here. They were MADNESS!!!! Yes, I survived, but was pretty scared traveling up them. It's ok, we got here safe and sound! Thank goodness! I think one thing pretty much all of us agree on is that we don't want to drive across the country again for a long time nor are we going to move any time soon! :)

One really great thing about where we are all living is that we are all walking distance from each other. We couldn't believe how that worked out and are pretty blessed by it! God knows what He is doing and has been completely faithful to us in that aspect! :)

We just need prayer right now and would love for you to join us in prayer for these things: 6 of us don't have jobs so it's a hard time on the team, Clint and Rachel's house hasn't been sold yet, but we are praying confidently that it will be sold soon so they can get out here and join us, prayer for the fact that we are miles and miles away and we are starting to feel the reality of how hard it is to not be in Indy, prayer for RD Reid and his family as he was in a lawn mower accident a couple of days ago and has no movement from his waist down and has extensive burns to his right side of his body (currently he is in the burn unit at Wishard), and pray that we love each other in the places where we are at wherever that may be. Each day is different and new, and causes all of us to go through so many different emotions. We are just starting to adjust to a new place, which means getting lost a lot and not having a clue where anything is yet. We are excited to be here and know God is with us out here!

Much love to you all! We do think about you, our friends and family, a lot and appreciate all of you!

Stacie :)

New and Confused

2008-08-06T21:05:00.000-07:00

So, here we are sitting on our new front porch (concrete slab really), and enjoying a lovely Oregon night. Staci and I are really excited to be here, mostly because the driving and unpacking are over. We have been in Eugene for 5 days now and are adjusting to a new town, new apartment, and a whole new time zone. We have gone out on little exploratory adventures to check out the city, but have found out that we have no idea where anything is. As I drive, I have the map in one hand, and the "I'm sorry I cut you off wave" motioning with the other. But, it is fun to get lost and confused, at least that is what I keep telling Staci! We have experienced some pretty cool things the past few days, but I think the coolest experience came tonight. You see, one thing I have been praying and meditating on since we have been here is to take my time and just "be" in the day I am in. My mind tends to meander its way to ideas that I don't want to have. Does that make sense? If not, then welcome to my world, ha! So, I am trying to take it all in and just enjoy the day-to-day experiences. Of course, I want to meet people, start lovin' on them, make them my friends, have them over for coffee and conversation, and show them Christ. However, I must rest in the fact that God is perfect and His timing is perfect just the same. So, I am realizing that it is my job to enjoy the newness and confusion that is upon me in my new home. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you about tonight. Staci and I are just sitting down to dinner, delicious homemade hawaiian pizza, when one of our neighbors and his friend walk up. We have not met our new neighbor yet, so this is the first chance we get. The first thing I notice is that he has two recognizable items in his had...frisbees for disc golf! Awesome! Anyways, we begin to talk with the two guys, both name Aaron, and have a great conversation. Our neighbor is excited to find out that we are here in a Church planting effort because although he is not a church-goer, he is looking forward to having deep spiritual conversations with me. I say great, bring it on. And then I think, crap, I better get studying! It was the first real conversation Staci and I have had with anyone here, and it is encouraging. We are trying to be in today, and tomorrow, we will be in tomorrow. God is working here in Eugene. We are humbled to be with Him here. Have a great week everyone!

2008-07-29T09:23:00.000-07:00

I had this whole blog written about how I don't understand God's timing in my life. It was very depressing actually:) And at the bottom I asked for God's peace...the kind that Staci had before she left where she was ok with leaving everyone. As I was typing it out, I had this weird feeling that I was asking for something that I already had, and that I was asking for it out loud just to make it known. Leaving stinks. A lot. I keep hanging out with people expecting it to be the last time in awhile, but then keep making plans to hang out 1 more time....(ask me how I'm doing at the end of the week when I don't get any more "one more times")...and that has kept my emotions at bay. But even though this process really hurts, I know that without a doubt, God wants me to experience this and go. And I think that peace comes from that knowledge. And I know that we all have that; I've seen it in people's eyes. So as I write down my thoughts, I leave feeling like I haven't said anything prophetic or inspiring, but I wanted to freeze this moment for myself and everyone else in my church...as things get even crazier in the weeks to come, right now my "joy" comes in the form of peace. True, it's peace covered by layers of frusteration and anxiety. But it's there. And I had to stop and write competely different drafts in order to see it. This is an intense journey. Sarah K.

Is anyone reading this?

2008-07-22T21:57:00.000-07:00

Since I found out about this blog site, I've been reluctant to post anything because of the simple fact of others seeing how I'm struggling. Here's the thing...IT'S DIFFICULT RIGHT NOW.

So, in an attempt to process some of what I'm feeling/experiencing right now, I'd like to share with you, and more than likely in fragmented thoughts, what's going on inside of my mind/heart. I'm currently in Austin, TX at the National Worship Leaders Conference and am experiencing God in some very cool ways. God has once again proven to me that He is good and that He is justly and graciously in control of my life. I didn't want to come and gain a mass of knowledge about how to "pull off" a sound worship service, but, wanted to learn how to live into becoming a tool that is used to lead people to the throne of God. As I walked into the sanctuary here at Riverbend Church, I quickly felt walls being built within my heart. This church building's appearance and setup encompassed precisely what I have been "turned off" by in the suburban church of Bible-belt America. With that being said, I am in no way saying Riverbend Church is not pursuing God, or doing great works for God's Kingdom; however, I am trying to point at the battles going on within myself. So from the minute I stepped into the church up 'til now, I've attempted to deconstruct the very barriers that have been preventing me from experiencing God fully here in Austin. So, I pray.

Yesterday, Matt Redman led a worship set starting with Blessed Be Your Name. Now, I've sang/led this song many times and have grown to love it, but also have grown comfortable with it (comfort can be a dangerous thing...comfort turning into discomfort can also be a dangerous thing). The past couple of weeks I have been having conversations with God about why He gives then takes away. Why do I have a great family, but feel like they are being taken away by this calling I have for Eugene? Why, when everything was going well at One|Accord, do a group of us decide to step out into the unknown and have things be made difficult? Why, when I start to develop such a love and adoration for a young lady, do I feel like I'm being ripped away from that close proximity? It's simple...

I don't have a clue.

But, yesterday reminded me that I must choose everyday to cry out "blessed be Your name, Lord. You are truly my strength in time of need and my Sustainer in life."

You give and take away.
You give and take away.
My heart will choose to say.
Lord, blessed be Your name.

It's a choice each day. Paul writes in Romans 5, "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character, and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." He doesn't say that we should beg and plead with God to bring understanding to our sufferings, but that we should rejoice. And for me right now, that means that I must choose to say, "blessed be Your name." But what about these feelings of sadness, anger, frustration, etc.? I know they are valid. I know they are real. This morning in a main session, Dr. Leonard Sweet spoke about our lives being a holistic experience (mental, emotional, spiritual), instead of it being fragmented and our mental, emotional, and spiritual being separate from each other. So much of our worship, or our lives in reaction to what God is doing, involves the mental, emotional, and spiritual. I think it's "ok" to feel frustration with things in life, but still be crying, "blessed be Your name."

This is long, and I apologize if you're still reading, but also thank you for sticking with this post. Love you all.

[colb]

Being present

2008-07-16T20:23:00.000-07:00

I'm excited, nervous, happy, sad, and any other word you want to fill in for me. It's a time of transition. I knew that this time was going to happen for months now, but now it's really becoming real. Yes, I am moving out to Eugene. Yes, on Aug. 5 I leave with CJ and Sarah to Eugene. Yes, I am grieving the loss of leaving friends and family. Yes, I am an emotional nutcase at certain moments. Yes, I am excited for what God has in store for me and for the team. And yes, I am enjoying it. I don't know how I will feel when I actually get into the rental truck and head out of Indy with all my belongings. What will be going through my mind? I don't think I can mentally prepare for that sort of thing. But I'm excited for this new journey I'm on. It's such a new experience for me. One that I have to trust God in every step along the way. There's a lot of unknowns for me currently and it's easy for me to become fearful. Since I want control of my life fear takes over. Trusting by faith is something that God has been teaching me. I'm continuing to learn how to trust, let go of my own control, and just be present. I have 9 other people on the team that keep challenging me and loving me right where I am. And I have many other people in my life who are supporting me. I thank you. And I know that all of the team have people in their lives who are supporting them and I know that they thank you as well.

Until I leave to go out to Eugene I will be enjoying my time here in Indy with friends and family...my theme for the next couple of weeks will be to just be present.

Much love to you all,
Stacie :)

We're on the webernet!

2008-06-27T17:35:00.000-07:00

Welcome to our blog... we will try to keep it updated!
Time is drawing near for us to leave Indianapolis and move to the other side of the country. Most of us have been preparing our hearts and minds as well as our friends and family for a while now. But we have all had our moments of doubt and questioning...
"God really? You really want me to do this? Leave friends and family, and move to a very different part of the country? and live? possibly forever?"
Some days it still seems crazy. Many of us have already gotten the "cult" question. Just for the record- no, it's not a cult. We are being sent by Common Ground Christian Church to live out our faith in a different place. You can call it a church plant if you like. We understand that some people really don't know what that means or understand all the reasons why we would do something like this... that's ok. But just know we are trying to do our best to follow Jesus where ever He leads us. :)